Attack ads against Jesus - comedy gold.

In open competition with Tommyrot's link proving that humans really really suck, I would like to offer this as evidence that being an asshole can cross over into the banality of evil:

Zito lends a hand: Barry Zito is reaching out to a Pennsylvania boy who was victimized by his T-ball coach over playing time. The sad tale involved a coach who told one of his players to harm a teammate, who's autistic, because the coach didn't want to play the boy the league minimum three innings.

According to a report in the Pittsburgh Tribune-Review, the coach, Mark Reed Downs Jr., is accused of trying to pay $25 to a 7-year-old teammate to injure the 8-year-old autistic boy.

According to local police, the boy was hit by baseballs behind his left ear and in the groin and treated at a hospital.

Zito, who's on the Positive Coaching Alliance's national advisory board, invited the boy and his family to be guests at an A's game and meet the team, if transportation can be arranged, perhaps later in the season in Cleveland or Baltimore, if not in Oakland.

Couldn't Zito go beat the crap out of the coach? I think that would be excellent.

So I just realized that I pronounce Raquel with an ah sound, but Raq like rack. What's up with that?

I pronounce Raq with the ah sound.

Raq Lobster. Raq-A-Bye-Baby. Raq of Ages. Eagle Raq Rag. Jingle Bell Raq. The Raq. Hand That Raqs the Cradle. Little Raq. Ayers Raq. Big Raq Candy Mountain. It's Only Raq and Roll, But I Like It. Raq Around the Clock. Pet Raq. I Wanna Raq with You. Cat in a roomful of Raqing chairs. On this Raq I build my church. Raaaqsanne. Raq star. Schoolhouse Raq. Raqabilly. Raqerfeller. We Will Raq You. I Love Raq and Roll. Kid Raq. Raq Steady. Raq Bottom. Sgt. Raq. If the van's a-Raqin', don't come knockin'. Hanging Raq. Hard Raq. A Raq, a River, a Tree.

Watch for falling Raqs.

Alright, the tightened (righty tighty!) blue thing now has no running noise, but the tank only fills about half way. Other than conserving water (which is a good thing) am I changing something that matters?

Hmmm... like Gud said, diagnosing the toilet without seeing it is difficult.

If your toilet still flushes OK, then it's probably fine. But with less water in the tank it might have difficulties at times....

Attack ads against Jesus - comedy gold.

Jesus is all "turn the other cheek" and such, but let's not forget who coined the phrase "Vengeance is mine." The Right might learn a few things about political retribution from a candidate's family when Rove turns to a pillar of salt after a spate of attack ads.

Zito is not allowed to hit people (or anything) with his hands. He may kick, but only if he is wearing mega-protective boots. The As cannot afford to have somebody go on the DL for so silly a reason as beating up an asshole.

There was that dude this spring, who went on the DL due to falling down the stairs while carrying in his groceries, but I think David Wells's near-wrist-amputation by wine glass and Sammy Sosa's back-strain by sneeze take the cake for bizarre off-field injuries.

The guy could just stand there while Zito takes pitching practice at him.

Couldn't Zito go beat the crap out of the coach? I think that would be excellent.

As Nutty notes, he would be better off throwing a fastball at the guy's head. Though for that particular game, I'd prefer Rich Harden.

There was that dude this spring, who went on the DL due to falling down the stairs while carrying in his groceries,

As it later came out, he was actually carrying a whole side of venison, not just groceries.

but I think David Wells's near-wrist-amputation by wine glass and Sammy Sosa's back-strain by sneeze take the cake for bizarre off-field injuries.

Those are good, but I'm still fond of Wade Boggs hurting his back while taking off his cowboy boots. Baseball generates a plethora of weird off-field injuries.

I'm still fond of Wade Boggs hurting his back while taking off his cowboy boots.

And Ken Griffey's grotesquely swollen jaw....

No, wait. I'm thinking of the Simpsons.

In typical post-and-run fashion, I present to you serious-conversation-havers: A thirteen pound gummy bear.