Ok.

So, talking to Bride last night. The person she had originally been referred to to come to the hotel to do our hair and make-up (Bride is doing it at her parents house) had a disconnected number. I called, got info from the congierge at the Ritz-Carlton (where the bridal party is staying) and gave it to her last night. Day Spa 5 minutes away. They can't say yet if they can send stylists to the hotel because it's too soon. She seemed happy with this info.

I also mentioned (I am a dumbass) I had thought about getting some snacks and what not and the bridesmaids could drop by for an informal lunch since were all going to be in the hotel and not have anything to do really, since we don't have to be anywhere for pictures until 3pm. SHE FREAKED OUT. "No. I didn't want to do a bridal luncheon and I think it's creepy and it's not what I envisioned and I'll want to be there cause I'll feel left out! I guess I'll try to be there. I didn't want that."

Ok, bitch. Chill. It was informal, if you don't want it, fine. Your day, not mine. Just an idea.

So I jokingly say, "Well, you surely don't care if we go have breakfast do you? Like we see them in the lobby and say, 'Hey, Bridesmaid and Husband, want to go to IHOP?'"

SHE DOES. She said, "No, I don't want that either. I don't want you guys to see each other until you see me up in the suite. I had it envisioned a certain way and I didn't want you guys to go get your hair done, but if that's what you want, well, I guess that's what you'll do."

So, I had to explain that I don't want that, I was giving her the information I got. I made no appointments for anyone, I didn't ask for a block, I simply got information. Furthermore, I'm not trying to organize a Bridal Luncheon, I want to know if another bridesmaid walks into IHOP, can I sit with her. Apparently not.

So, she stomps off, I have another cigarette and then I remember I have to call her and get the info for the flower girl dress place cause one of them is too small and I volunteered to find out the options since the girl's mother is a total bitchwhore. Bride starts pestering me again and I say, "It's your day. If you don't want it, that's fine. Nope, I'm not mad. Why would I be mad?" She recants her statement and says "Of course you can have breakfast with whomever you want."

Well, no shit. And I will, thank you very much.

Also, I was informed that her wedding coordinator will be calling all of the bridesmaids and groomsmen to make sure we are where we need to be in our preperations off and on during the day.

THWUMP THWUMP THWUMP

Aims, I know this is your friend, but she's starting to sound nuts. (okay, maybe we passed starting on this wedding many weeks ago.)

If she has a wedding coordinator, why are you doing all this stuff? Isn't this what Jennifer Lopez is supposed to do while waiting for Matthew McConaughey?

(belated) happy anniversary to Jess and Ethan!

Stephanie, that sounds lovely. I've always wanted to go to Puerto Rico. I hope it's a really wonderful experience.

Yay PC on the job-having. Specific to your education job-ma heading your way.

Aimee, (though you have probably already posted while I've herded cats and babies since I started this post), I want to know.

I've been threadsucking for recipes. I've found tantalizing mentions of some but no specifics:

Hil talking about her grandmother's recipes
Jess talking about her gazpacho and vegetarian chili
Anne talking about some amazing-sounding swedish pancakes, and
Plei talking about lemon curd.

I think we need them in the cookbook.

If she has a wedding coordinator, why are you doing all this stuff?

Because her wedding coordinator is only for the day of the actual wedding.

Oh, Aimee, Aimee, Aimee. I think I'm going to suddenly find a groom and get myself married that same weekend. And I need you to be in the wedding. And it's going to be nice and low-key...just a little party and some friends gathering for a nice evening. There may or may not be toasts.

Kitty!!!

Aimee, spill.

Stephanie, yay! I've wanted to go to PR since '91. It sounds lovely.

In other words, she's more a wedding wrangler than a wedding planner.

If my jaw hits the floor many more times, I may break it....

No, I don't want that either. I don't want you guys to see each other until you see me up in the suite.

I swear to god Aimee and I are in the same wedding. (Except that I'm the only BM in mine, and I may have been fired, so probably not. But the brides may be separated-at-birth evil twins.)

No snacking together before pictures? That's quite an impressive level of wanting things like she wants them. Wow.