Weepy-Rant ahead, ahoy!
So the Drama of the Repossesion lives on.
I begged them to take 4 payments of $625 3 weeks ago. They summarily dismissed me. Then, after the money was gone, they said, "Ok. We need the first payment tomorrow." Well, suffice to say, we don't have it. Now, they'll take monthly payments at $200/month, but only if they get a "good faith" payment of $800 first. Here, let me check my buttcrack. There it is! Wow!
I know I screwed up and I want to make good. But why do I have to be punished? Constantly? My stomach is in knots. It's the only thing I think about all day. I can barely work, I don't want to spend time with Em cause I'm afraid I'm a horrible mom/person to have brought her into this world with all of these problems and I just keep slipping further and further down this slope of self-doubt, loathing and anger. I'm looking into getting a second job so that we can save money to move and pay off crap. We don't live beyond our means, I'm not trying to fuck the system. Why do I get ridden hard and put away wet when others out there get to skate on by, fucking people and companies left right and center? I am so sick of trying to be the good guy.
Kate, so sorry to hear about your grandfather.
My cats, particularly Sammie, seem bent on convincing Daniel they don't get fed enough. They've stopped bothering with me, as I am the one who isn't feeding them enough. Daniel stopped by on his lunch break, and ate while listening to the Sammie "I'm hungry, I need your food" seranade.
Happy B-Day, Fred Pete!
Aw, Aims...
Em is an extremely fortunate little girl. Worry about everything in the world but that.
Awwww...{{{Aimee}}} I'm so sorry love. I wish I could help out some way...
Sorry Aimee, much punctuation.
{{{{{Aimee}}}}}
I have no helpful advice, apart from saying that you are so very not a horrible person
Punctuation and money~ma to Aimee. I'm sorry you are having such a rough time. You are a good mom. You love your daughter so much, and you care so deeply about doing right by her. Spend time with her. And spend some time taking care of yourself. When you find yourself afraid of screwing up, remember that as we all screw up, you want to teach Emma how to fix screw ups rather than pretending to her that her mom Has To Be Perfect, and therefore if she is less than Perfect, she's no good.
ETA: "up" because this just wasn't meant to pr0n
{{{Aimee}}} I hate the money woes, yes I do.
