Glory ,'The Killer In Me'
[NAFDA] Spike-centric discussion. Lusty, lewd (only occasionally crude), risque (and frisque), bawdy (Oh, lawdy!), flirty ('cuz we're purty), raunchy talk inside. Caveat lector.
Unless the landlord specifically requests that you leave I don't see why you can't continue to pack and drink coffee. Actually, when you are selling a house they say to brew a pot before you show the house because it makes the place smell good.
Are you naked? Landlords sometimes prefer not to show too much.
Are you naked? Landlords sometimes prefer not to show too much.
Well, that was lucky then. I'd just gotten up and gone through the whole pants/no pants debate when they called. I chose wisely.
(Teppy, I spent a lot of time in VT this past week and have many recs for places you will probably have no time to visit.)
Oooh -- lay them on me! I think we'll have chunks of downtime (i.e., 1-3 hours, which is not enough for me to drive down to Boston and play, dang it), and I'm going to need Planned Activities so as not to kill my dad for bugging me endlessly.
Where were you in VT?
Good morning, all.
t mememe
Hung out with bunch of folks last night including Rejecting!Crush!Girl. It was completely fine, we interacted normally, I really think awkwardness will be avoided. We shall remain good friends, especially (I think) since I'm going home for 3 weeks starting Monday, a good time to let any lingering awkwardness fade. Yay.
At the same time, woke up REALLY sad. Hurts more today than yesterday. I'm fairly certain a relationship would never have worked out, but it would've been so much fun to try it. Le sigh.
t /mememe
Lyra, I'm sorry your brother is being dumb. Sounds like a bad situation.
I want the Hello Kitty dress. I don't know why. I think I should just hang it on my wall as a conversation piece.
Monday is my dad's birthday. Normally I'd give him a book and/or the See's Little Pops I know he likes, but from what Mom told me of his condition, he could no longer appreciate either gift. So I'm thinking of sending flowers to both of them, something cheerful like daisies or sunflowers. Does that sound like a good idea?
There are so many practical details that I have no idea how to manage. Mostly I go about my everyday business and interests, though I've set aside some time each day to pray for my parents and generally spend time reflecting. But throughout I keep having thoughts like, "Bereavement fares--how do they work?" or, "Do I need to buy a new dress, or would that black sweater be respectful and appropriate with a nice skirt?" or, "Flower arrangements--do I go in with my brothers, or do we each send our own? If the latter, how do I know what's appropriate?" Stuff like that.
I think that sounds like a lovely idea for a birthday gift, Susan.
There are so many practical details that I have no idea how to manage. Mostly I go about my everyday business and interests, though I've set aside some time each day to pray for my parents and generally spend time reflecting. But throughout I keep having thoughts like, "Bereavement fares--how do they work?" or, "Do I need to buy a new dress, or would that black sweater be respectful and appropriate with a nice skirt?"
How does your family handle the ceremony surrounding death? Have you been to anything for other relatives, or close family friends? Will there be a wake, and a funeral, or memorial service, or something different? Do they usually do everything in the Funeral Parlor, or do they have a church service, as well?
Around here, I wear what I'd wear to church (although I try to stay away from anything too bright and peppy) for a funeral, and for my own Dad's funeral and wake, I did stick to black.
As for bereavement fares, each airline handles it differently. I know cousins who had to get a copy of their Dad's death certificate, so I don't know how many details you can iron out ahead of time. But, you could call whatever airline you'd typically take back home, and see what their requirements are, so that when it is time, you won't have to think; you can just refer to a checklist.
Where the flowers are concerned, this is something you can just discuss with your brothers now, or when it comes up in the conversation, or when you feel the time is right, or only once it is an issue--whatever feels most comfortable to you and them. Florists are used to coming up with big funeral arrangements on short notice. What you'll probably do is let your mother select her arrangement first. She may want something special, and then work around that. I know people who have gone in on arrangements with their siblings, and families who have each given their own arrangement. Sometimes, there is one arrangement from all the grandchildren. It depends on what you'd like to do, what your siblings would like to do, finances, and what your mom wants to do.
"Bereavement fares--how do they work?"
When I needed to fly back to NM for my dad's funeral, I just called the airlane and told the person I needed a bereavement fare. They were really nice about it. I would've rather just stuck my card in the computer kiosk, but for an interacting-with-a-person experience it wasn't bad.
Can't help you with the rest...I wouldn't send flowers myself, but maybe an audiobook? I sent my dad massage oil, as his wife said that it felt good to have the radiation spots rubbed.
Not acknowleding their birthdays, especially, strikes me as being disrespectful and tacky.It is, Lyra. I hope he returns to the family soon and apologizes profusely.
I think I was just seeing situations of my own when you described things. Made me want to defend him a little. I have issues. But they are mine so I shouldn't get all projectile with them.
I'm fairly certain a relationship would never have worked out, but it would've been so much fun to try it. Le sigh.Sorry you are going through this. Sometimes things are fun to just try, even if you really know they aren't going to last.
So I'm thinking of sending flowers to both of them, something cheerful like daisies or sunflowers. Does that sound like a good idea?That sounds like a lovely idea to me, Susan. Never underestimate how much well-timed flowers can brighten a room and the people in them if they like flowers.
I need to set up my online bill paying, figure out a budget, mail a few checks for hopefully the last time, clean my house sans vacuum and try to figure out why I am already sweating today. Blerg.
I should also start figuring out what new vacuum to buy. Feh.
The online bill paying is a good thing though. A really good thing.
but for an interacting-with-a-person experience it wasn't bad.This is a great description.
How does your family handle the ceremony surrounding death? Have you been to anything for other relatives, or close family friends? Will there be a wake, and a funeral, or memorial service, or something different? Do they usually do everything in the Funeral Parlor, or do they have a church service, as well?
The last family funeral (and the last Alabama funeral) I went to was my paternal grandmother's, when I was 18, so 16 years ago. Which is partly why I'm vague on this. But there's usually a viewing in the funeral parlor the night before the funeral, and then a church funeral, which I assume will be in my childhood church, because that's where the family burial ground is, even though my parents haven't gone there since I was 16. Not a wake per se, but people usually gather at the person's house before and after the funeral, and friends and relatives bring covered dishes and desserts.
The problem with clothes is I no longer own much of anything that would be considered church clothes by Alabama standards--my church in Seattle is much more casual, my last job was the same, and such dressy clothes as I do have I doubt fit my post-pregnant body. I can just barely still wear my old interview suit, and it's more loosely tailored than most of the dresses in my closet.
Probably the sensible thing is to do a little shopping next week. The skirt and sweater would be fine for the viewing, I think, and it's better to look for a dress now than to have to do it in 24 hours while trying to pack and make last-minute arrangements to catch a flight.
Yes, it is better to look ahead of time, I think. And if you find something, pack it right away. You might want to pre-pack a few things, or make a list, so you have less stress when the time comes.
I remember shopping for clothes for me, for my dad's wake and funeral, after he died. My two youngest kids were sick, and it was the middle of a blizzard, and I'd spent most of the week by my father's bedside, hadn't slept, and had dropped 10 or 15lbs in the week. Shopping was a nightmare-joke. I ended up getting things I didn't really like on me, but they were presentable enough.
I think what you've called the viewing is what we call a wake up here, and it's either held over the course of two days (only in the evening two days before the funeral, and then on the afternoon and evening, on the day before the funeral), or just the day before (afternoon and evening). Then the funeral is either in the church, or at the funeral parlor, depending on the family's preferences. My Catholic friends' funerals are always from the church.
Do any of your brothers live near your folks, to help your mom make arrangements and whatnot?