You should have been on top of that yourself, if you want to be treated like an adult by your folks.

I was. My plan, as I told them many, many times, was always to stay here until I found a job. Initially, I was going to find an actual job, but when that didn't pan out, my job search branched out. The plan was then a little fuzzier, and I knew that when the time came, I'd either have to break my lease or find a subletter. It was definitely my fault not to find out that breaking my lease would not be an option, but I would deal with that when I got my actual job offer. At no time did I ever suggest to my parents that I would be willing to move back home. I always said I'd find some stupid job here to support me while I look for a real job.

If I were you, and I'm clearly not, I would seriously consider signing the lease for the next year, and getting myself some filler job, so that you can keep paying the rent, and restrict my job search to the greater Ann Arbor area. If nothing good comes up by like April, you start looking far and wide again, and at most, you'll only be taking a hit on the rent for a couple of months, if you get dream job.

As I said earlier, restricting my location turned out to be a mistake, and I'm prepared to deal with any hoops I might need to jump through if I find a job somewhere else.

{{{{PC}}}} Lots of good advice comin' thru here, I have nothing to add, but virtual hugs and hairpats, wishing I could deliver them in person, and wishing you all the ~ma you'll need to find some resolution in this. 'Cuz clearly that's something you need in spades - this whole situation has been tying you up in knots for so long...

I am currently annoyed with the entire state of Minnesota.

I had towels and sheets hanging out on the line, only out there for an hour or so. Slowly the sky gets darker and darker. I hear nothing to alert me - no dust storms, no thunder. Just as I reach to turn on the desk lamp, it occurs to me that it's only 4pm, and this time of year it doesn't get dark until 9ish. Or until it starts raining.

How am I supposed to know it is raining outside if the roof is not made of metal?

P-C, I"m going to give yo one more piece of advice. You do not have to explain your decisions to yoru parents. You do not have to defend your decision to stay in Ann Arbor. You do not have participate in a debate as to whether going on vaation for the first two weeks of August would be a good idea. Why have yo mader that decision? because it's what yo think is best. But why, specifically? You don't want to go into it, you thought long and hard and tried to take everything into account and explaining it all would be so much work.

Once you've made the decision, it's made. Don't open the door to attempts to unmake it.

It's either that or come up with a power point presentation on every choice you make from here on out for the rest of your life.

I'm sorry to laugh, Windsparrow, but that's funny.

When I'm not the one who has to deal with the wet laundry, etc., anyway.

You do not have to explain your decisions to yoru parents.

I think I did say something like, "Why can't I stay where I want to stay?" To no avail.

It's either that or come up with a power point presentation on every choice you make from here on out for the rest of your life.

Ooh, I could put that shit on my résumé.

It was definitely my fault not to find out that breaking my lease would not be an option, but I would deal with that when I got my actual job offer.

I'm a little confused about this, still. Why couldn't you break your lease? It's pretty standard that there is some provision for this in most leases, though very often you'll incur a penalty. How hard is it to find an apartment in AA - what's the likelihood that they wouldn't find a new tenant if you got a job elsewhere?

If the situation turns out to be that if you get a new job somewhere that's good enough to be worth moving for and you have to eat a month of rent to get out of your lease, that sounds okay.

Thanks, -t. I was going for the funny whine, rather than the whiney whine.

Of course, now I'm hungry for cheese.

I think I did say something like, "Why can't I stay where I want to stay?"

"I'm staying where I want to stay," might actually work better. It's really, really hard when you're dealing with your parents - but part of getting them to treat you like an adult is leading by example. That's a tough thing to do, but you have to take the first steps if you expect them to follow.

Time to find the stupid job, P-C. If watching the bank account go down with nothing going in is depressing- go get the stupid job. Today. Stop worring about what your folks are going to do, or not going to do. You don't have tiem for that.

Once you are working, you can wory about when and how you can see them again.

Your Father buys a ticket - you don't use it. His problem , not yours.

They come to see you, you are working. Thier problem not yours. ( not saying ignore them, but x amount of your time is booked)

Once you have an interview/ job interview. Call the 'rents or accept a phone call from them - or even send an email. SAy: Sorry I was so upset on the phone the other day. I was really walloped by a bunch of stuff. The lease, the job hunt, general money stuff and that burning need men have to take care of themselves. Luckily, I have a interview/ job and the prospect of bringing in a little cash has given me back my equilirbrium. I'll talk to you again , so we can work out a vist when I know my schedual better

BTW, if month to month is hard to find - someone will want to sublet your apartment when you leave. that's the way it works in a college town.