((P-C))
That's just ... just ... how do they honestly even expect this to end? Cause I'm not sensing hugs and a yen to marry the girl they'll have all picked out.
Question: Will hiding in a cavern with stockpiled chocolate goods be any part of this plan?
Xander ,'Get It Done'
Spike's Bitches 25 to Life
[NAFDA] Spike-centric discussion. Lusty, lewd (only occasionally crude), risque (and frisque), bawdy (Oh, lawdy!), flirty ('cuz we're purty), raunchy talk inside. Caveat lector.
Cass - Jul 25, 2005 9:33:35 am PDT #2780 of 10001
Bob's learned to live with tragedy, but he knows that this tragedy is one that won't ever leave him or get better.
Polter-Cow - Jul 25, 2005 9:33:39 am PDT #2781 of 10001
What else besides ramen can you scoop? YOU CAN SCOOP THIS WORLD FROM DARKNESS!
Can you get a deferrment? (Unemployment is a valid reason)
Ooh, really? Awesome. I'll have to look into that if this week doesn't turn out to have the boffo job response it's supposed to (the KC job has a new hiring manager who's ready to start interviewing people, and he just got back today; the CT job was supposed to be get back to me in 1-2 weeks, and tomorrow will make it a month).
stay there and tell your parents that their pulling this sort of thing has ensured you will NEVER move home if there is anything you can do to avoid it, including sleeping on friends' couches.
I'll try.
beathen - Jul 25, 2005 9:36:28 am PDT #2782 of 10001
Sure I went over to the Dark Side, but just to pick up a few things.
P-C, where is your quote from?
-t - Jul 25, 2005 9:36:28 am PDT #2783 of 10001
I am a woman of various inclinations and only some of the time are they to burn everything down in frustration
How about wearing black jeans and a black tank top and an ankh necklace and eye of horus eyeliner? Is that acceptable?
This is gonna be a big conversation, P-C. Try to stay calm, work out what you want to say beforehand if you can. Don't let your parents set the terms. Good luck.
Stephanie - Jul 25, 2005 9:37:17 am PDT #2784 of 10001
Trust my rage
Can you get a deferrment? (Unemployment is a valid reason)
Yeah, I don't know how this works, but I have many friends who have done it. In fact, that's my plan unless I find a job I really want that is conducive to mothering a small baby.
Mr. Broom - Jul 25, 2005 9:38:23 am PDT #2785 of 10001
"When I look at people that I would like to feel have been a mentor or an inspiring kind of archetype of what I'd love to see my career eventually be mentioned as a footnote for in the same paragraph, it would be, like, Bowie." ~Trent Reznor
Polter-Cow - Jul 25, 2005 9:39:32 am PDT #2786 of 10001
What else besides ramen can you scoop? YOU CAN SCOOP THIS WORLD FROM DARKNESS!
lisah - Jul 25, 2005 9:39:44 am PDT #2787 of 10001
Punishingly Intricate
I've got about nine months before I go bankrupt. Probably fewer, since I'll have to start repaying my loan during that time.
Temp and Defer! It's the post-graduate, hasn't landed dream job way! (And unless things have changed dramatically in the last 10 years you don't actually need to be completely unemployed to defer. You just have to show financial hardship.)
Fred Pete - Jul 25, 2005 9:39:46 am PDT #2788 of 10001
Ann, that's a ferret.
tell your parents that their pulling this sort of thing has ensured you will NEVER move home if there is anything you can do to avoid it
P-C, I'm not going to recommend that you say that (but I'm also not going to recommend not saying it).
What I am going to say is that you're an adult now. You're supporting yourself financially. This gives you power in your relationship with your parents, a lot more than you had as a child. You have the power to control contact, for example.
I'm not saying it's easy. But sometime (when you aren't so stressed out over your parents, and I don't have a memo to get to my boss) I'll tell you about my tangled (lack of) relationship with my parents. For now, I'll just say that the only way they can contact me is by snail mail.
But the decision is yours. Not theirs. Yours. And if they want to try to steamroller you, they now run a real risk of negative consequences for themselves.
Topic!Cindy - Jul 25, 2005 9:39:51 am PDT #2789 of 10001
What is even happening?
The problem is, his mother told the realtor that certain specific things were going to happen without bothering to let P-C know about it.Absolutely, and I would have thought that overstepping, even if they were paying the rent. I was just nosy about how big of an overstep this was. And, as you say Fred, the point is now moot.
Personally, I think you *should* stay there and be all parent-defying. If you have to take a retail job to pay the rent, so be it, but stay there and tell your parents that their pulling this sort of thing has ensured you will NEVER move home if there is anything you can do to avoid it, including sleeping on friends' couches.
This is what I think too, P-C. You don't have to approach it like a fight with them. You can give them the benefit of the doubt in conversation, by saying something like, "There must have been a miscommunication, mom, I'm not ready to terminate my lease. I thought you just offered to look into the particulars. I've notified the realtor I won't be terminating in August. It's not enough time for me."
But yeah, if you're no longer financially dependent on them, draw a (quiet and gentle if need be) line in the sand, here. Find something to tide you over, even a retail or waiter job, while you're doing your serious job hunting, and start taking possession of your own life. To the extent that they'll hear it, you can say everything to your parents in a friendly manner, "Oh, no thanks. I won't be going on the vacation but thanks for thinking of me," or "On, no thanks. I am going to keep my lease for now, but thanks for your help." You only have to get stompy footed if they issue orders. Otherwise, treat what they "tell" you to do as kindly suggestions that aren't your cup of tea.