{{{Raquel}}} I am glad you are seeking help for your depression. Much ~ma to you.

Raquel, many of the medications for PPD work with BF.

My godsons' mother had severe PPD with the last boy, and was able to continue to BF him as long as she'd wanted to. He's (holy hell) five now, and doing peachy keen dandy fine.

Well, okay, he's an exceptionally physically adept hellion, but somehow, I think that's his genes, not any medication side effect, as his older brother's the same way.

Cereal: I'm NOT trying to sound like a LLL zombie. Given my depressive history + troubled pregnancy, I was at high risk for PPD, so I wound up researching the options in case my depression flared up, and felt the urge to share in the event that you desire to continue to BF.

Thanks Plei - I have to admit I haven't researched the meds and their interactions with BFing fully (I'm doing that right now in fact). I would love to be able to continue to breastfeed, especially for the nighttime feedings, but I'm trying to prep myself mentally for stopping by listing the positives: Losing weight! Fitting my bras again! Back on the Pill (my ob/gyn here refuses to prescribe any oral contra during BF)!

Still.

I'm also researching the formula here, free of FDA oversight as it is. Looks pretty much identical, except for including DHA.

It is best to be prepared for all of it.

Can you get formula with DHA shipped to you?

Your OB/Gyn won't prescribe even the mini-pill? Gah! How horrible.

I admit, I'm hating being on the thing (no serious mood swings until I started it six weeks ago and my skin is a wreck), and am counting the days until my Mirena appointment (6), but thank fuck it was an option, y'know?

God, the sites about antidepressants are...depressing. Everything's spelled wrong. And there are apostrophes in untoward places: Apostrophe's. And they're all full of TRUE STORIES OF ANTI-DEPRESSANT-RELATED DEATH!!! and FREE PAXIL!!! Which I gather is not the equine version of "Free Willy."

And there are apostrophes in untoward places: Apostrophe's.

How about quotation marks in odd "places"?

Some of that, also. And one site listed the following:

Depression Medication Side Effects

Zoloft Side Effects, Sertraline Antidepressant Drug Side Effects

MAKING A DOUBLE RIFLE FROM A SIDE BY SIDE SHOTGUN

I'm not entirely sure that last is a good thing to provide to depressed people. Not only the obvious, but a rifle's not the tool for the job, so you'd screw it up and be even more depressed.

The info at Kellymom is usually pretty good: [link]

Second-date~ma for Fay. Although I am amazed that she could be insecure.

Well, you know, I suspect that I look thinner online. But y'all are fabulous for reassuring a person. (And I'm all ablush at the recollection of how many Buffistas I ended up snogging at the F2F. Am tart. Although apparently not a bad snog, so yay for that.)

Hurrah for billytea, and Riddle Girl. (Whom I shall not dub Tom.) She's a very lucky lass. (Yep, got to say the billyteacrush? Still very much alive and kicking. You're adorability on a stick, mate.)

Hurrah for Susan, with the mad writing skillz! About time the universe did something good for you!

Re: second date. It was another nice evening - this time we just went out for coffee, and sat and talked and talked and talked for three or four hours. I enjoyed it, and he made me laugh, and he's well travelled and rather geeky and knows about stuff I don't know about, which is cool, but I'm finding myself off put by (a) the expattishness and (b) a sort of scaredness.

I mean, he didn't come across as being racist, but I think he's quite entrenched in the expat lifestyle, and maybe not really recognising that there are reasons why people here (especially working class people) do mad-seeming things, and that these reasons can be more complex than 'they're stupid, we're so much more sensible'. Type of thing. Which I haven't expressed very well, but you get the jist.

And then the scaredness - well, I'm even worse at expressing this. But there's a sort of defensive irony/wanting to fit in thing going on with him, I think. And I find, in my old age (ha!) that I'm very comfortable in my own skin, at least in that respect. I don't dress fashionably - I dress the way I want to dress, which involves big hats, a wide array of scarves, long skirts and interesting handbags, and I really don't mind being stared at for it. I don't use textspeak when texting, I use standard spellings and punctuation. I have quite decided opinions on things. I get excited about silly things, and take unironic delight in other things which most people my age wouldn't enjoy. (Genuinely enjoy cutting out snowflakes//making Tudor Houses out of cereal boxes/discussing World War II with 7 year olds/watching 'Samurai Jack', etc etc.) Which is all good. I like where I'm at with this. But I don't think that's where he's at. I could be mistaken.

I don't know - it may well be that I'm being too picky. I enjoyed his company, and we had no lack of things to talk about. And I think if he could just relax more - huh. But you shouldn't look at people like that, should you? 'If I could change this thing about you' type of thing. That's not nice.

This may be one of the reasons I don't go on more dates, huh? But - I don't feel like there's a gaping hole in my life that needs filling. (No smutty jokes from the cheap seats, thank you!) Not for the sake of being filled, at least. So - I think it's okay to be picky. Even if that's liable to have me end up an old maid whose corpse is gnawed away by her cats for weeks before anyone notices I'm dead.

...'Course, maybe part of the reason I think that is because I've got what is to all intents and purposes (bar sex) a relationship already, with my flatmate. But I think that I should get on with a potential lover at least as well as I get on with my flatmate, shouldn't I? (Granted, we get on well enough that my ex-boss thinks we're a couple, but still. You get the picture.)