I think I'll spend some time calming down and then bring it up in as unaccusatory and defensive way as possible.
This sounds like the right approach. He made a mistake in not telling you, but it might not be a sign of untrustworthiness, just one bad choice. It's been so great seeing you all happy about him, I hope he can be worthy of you.
Jen, nothing to add, but I think you're getting wise advice.
ION, one of the things the wedding party wants me to do for them Saturday is order pizza for delivery at noon. The wedding is at 1:00. Am I the only one who thinks chowing down on greasy pizza an hour before your wedding is a disaster waiting to happen?
I think the wedding is going to be a bit of a mess just because they're turned such a determined blind eye to the physical realities of the church. They invited 400 to a place that comfortably seats 275, and can cram in maybe 315. They wanted as many tables in the fellowship hall as possible, even though that reduces the capacity of the room to hold people comfortably, and they're planning to have dancing. I still haven't figured out how they plan on pulling that off, since when the fellowship hall is filled to capacity with tables, it by definition doesn't have a big empty space for a dance floor.
IMO their problem is they're trying for a big wedding on a small budget, which is certainly do-able, but I'm not sure they've made the wisest tradeoffs.
Maybe the fact that this bothers me so much is an indication that I'm not ready to date.
No, it means that your working things out. I think that if you do talk to him about it, it will be the best indication that you are ready to date. And, possibly, that you are doomed.
Am I the only one who thinks chowing down on greasy pizza an hour before your wedding is a disaster waiting to happen?
It doesn't sound like a good idea, but, fortunately, all you have to do is order the pizza, and let the chips (pepperoni) fall where they may.
As for the tables and dancing, can you maybe lay out some dance floor sizes in tape in the hall and have the bride in to see how much space it actually takes?
It doesn't sound like a good idea, but, fortunately, all you have to do is order the pizza, and let the chips (pepperoni) fall where they may.
True. It's all very much Not My Problem. But I can't help boggling nonetheless.
As for the tables and dancing, can you maybe lay out some dance floor sizes in tape in the hall and have the bride in to see how much space it actually takes?
Well, at this point the room is set up according to their requests. If when they come in tomorrow to decorate they're unhappy with the layout, I'd be happy to help them take down a few tables and rearrange. Mainly I'm puzzled. If they'd asked for the fellowship hall set up with mostly chairs ringing the room and a few tables in the corners, they'd have plenty of room to accommodate all their guests (lecture-hall style the room's capacity is 450 or so), but as is they'll only have room for about 200 seated guests. And they KNOW this. At least, I told them, and I'm sure they can do the math of 20 tables with ten chairs each. I just don't get it.
Susan, make sure they give you the money up front, for the pizza.
Susan, make sure they give you the money up front, for the pizza.
Will do. Will definitely do.
Weird stuff, Susan. Though when I was a bride, I barely touched the pre-wedding food. Maybe she's counting on that. The too many people for the room arrangement I have no explanation for. Unless they think that many people who said they would come will not. Which seems like an odd thing to think, but hey, I don't know these people, it could be the case.
The too many people for the room arrangement I have no explanation for
Maybe it's a "Big fancy weddings have everyone sitting down at a table" thing. Her mindset may not allow her to budge on that.