vw, she's coming over to spend some quality time with her very good friend. Whom she doesn't want to see worn out either by trying to do too much physically, or emotionally by worrying. You're going to have a nice, relaxed evening together. Later, maybe, if you discover or think of the perfect little thing for her, you can give her an unexpected un-birthday present. And it will mean more than a here-it's-your-birthday last minute stopgap sort of thing.

Breathe. It'll be fine.

Or, you know, what Aimee said. For lo, the Empress is wise.

(waving at Katie)

vw, friendship means only having make sure dirty underwear os put away before someone comes over.

Oh, goodness! I can't even do that part right. Maybe the hampers of dirty clothes should be moved out of the kitchen.

vw, as a close friend, I'm sure she will look past whatever mess is around I really hate having people over when my house is a mess, but a friend shouldn't notice or care. As for the chocolates, that would frustrate me too, but this may give you an opportunity ti find out exactly what kind she likes. Sometimes post-birthday presents are even better because it makes your birthday last longer and you aren't expecting them.

Erin! Those FUCKOS! I can't even imagine how beyond pissed I would be in your situation. GRRRRRRR!

So, she's coming over...the place is a mess...I don't have the presents I wanted to get...and I just feel like a totally and completely inadequate friend.

She's not coming over to spend time with your floors, and she's not coming over to see what kind of loot she can score. She's coming over to hang out with you, her FRIEND, who is the antithesis of inadequate. You're sticking by her in a very tough situation, and I'm sure that's more valuable to her than all the Swiffers and diamonds in the world.

Don't stress; just enjoy the company.

Edited to correct my modifiers. Is there a local chapter of Pedants Anonymous?

I'm just afraid she's going to get here and I'm going to burst into tears. Great birthday, huh?

Go to your local Fredricks of Hollywood or Love Pantry and try on the corsets there to get an idea of how that one would fit before you buy it. (There should be corsets very similar to that one at both those stores.)

Also, frankly, these aren't really worth the money if you're looking for any sort of actual control. The boning is light and flimsy, and will cut into your flesh, and the construction is poor enough that the item will fall apart after a wearing or two.

Signed, learned the hard way years ago.

Ok. Back to trying to find an underblouse-y thing that I really like.

vw, I agree with everyone else about your house. She's coming to spend time with her friend. She doesn't care about your housekeeping. Would you care if her house wasn't spotless? If it were me, I'd want you to nap so you would be a bit rested for our evening of fun rather than worry abut the house.

vw, it's not like the both of you haven't been through some heavy stuff, and some of it together. Tears are nothing to be ashamed of, or afraid of, either. When she gets there, if you guys decide to go out, go to the chocolate place together. Ask her what she likes. Buy it for her then, and make her a present of it. See? Easy.

She's a friend. She knows you. It'll be fine.