He's clearly not stalking his friend--he's not around her unsolicited any more than Willow is, it's just normal friend stuff. He's not peering through her windows at night. I wouldn't even describe him as obsessed with a crush (I, on the other hand, do find that intensely disturbing--I just don't think Xander has gone to *any* extremes. He's just living in hope).
Did Mark make that leap? I'd hope not, for someone who dances around the world of words describing actual conditions existing on the screen to have the lack of empathy to do that.
There's a lot of complaint in the comments about Xander slut-shaming Cordelia. And trying to control Buffy's love life.
OMG, he's a lying sack of crap for that one time, but he's really not that invasive. He's clearly devoted to her for who she is, he's got her back as a friend, doesn't think she owes him sex, just that it would be really cool if he could get it. He's living in hope, and trying to nudge the game every now and again.
And Cordelia is everything-shaming everyone, So people insult her back? It's called fair play.
No, he's irritated that he continues to be openly jealous of all men who are not him, but it's mostly some commenters who have the big hate-on for Xander, the horribly sexist Nice Guy who is everything that is wrong with men or whatever.
That makes me sad, because that nice guy does exist. But Xander's not that guy. Which makes me wonder if some of them are that guy, but think they're not acting like Xander, so it's all good. I mean, someone's always that guy in a decently sized crowd.
There's a lot of complaint in the comments about Xander slut-shaming Cordelia. And trying to control Buffy's love life.
Well, yeah, he does that. But it's not like high school guys having GIANT blind spots that lead them to be be occasionally douchey to their female friends is all that unusual. It's pretty unreasonable to expect a 15 year-old from 1998 to act and think like a Pandagon blogger.
But to bag on Xander - doesn't that miss the point a bit? Willow and Xander were both socially awkward with their own hangups before Buffy came along. Willow was completely hung up on Xander for years. And as stated, Cordelia was a fucking asshole before her character shift that went into Angel.
I thought the point of it is that they all kind of act like assholes during the course of the series and...this is high school.
Although Xander looks like a man, we cannot expect realistic 30 year old behavior from a character who is supposed to be a sophomore/junior.
Eh, I think Xander does suffer from Nice Guy Syndrome. I don't hate him, but I want to punch him in the face a lot.
