thanks. Any tips, crits, etc. I wrote it last night, so it's rough
Hell, I don't know. If I had wanted schooling, I'da gone to school.
Jayne ,'Ariel'
The Great Write Way, Chapter Two: Twice upon a time...
A place for Buffistas to discuss, beta and otherwise deal and dish on their non-fan fiction projects.
Strix - Dec 16, 2007 6:45:30 pm PST #9598 of 10001
A dress should be tight enough to show you're a woman but loose enough to flee from zombies. — Ginger
Laura - Dec 16, 2007 6:46:18 pm PST #9599 of 10001
Our wings are not tired.
Oh, did I choose a good time to subscribe.
Very nice, Erin. Wow.
Amy - Dec 16, 2007 6:48:58 pm PST #9600 of 10001
Because books.
Erin! Dude, that's awesome!
These are my favorite lines:
Clean the night from my eyes
Scatter nightmares to the skies
Go, Erin, with the inspired poetry!
Strix - Dec 16, 2007 6:49:05 pm PST #9601 of 10001
A dress should be tight enough to show you're a woman but loose enough to flee from zombies. — Ginger
thanks. It's one thing insomnia is good for.
Laura - Dec 16, 2007 6:52:00 pm PST #9602 of 10001
Our wings are not tired.
Any tips, crits, etc.
So, to consider this request I read a couple more times. (didn't suffer)
and the only thing I would suggest is where you have
I shall rise I shall rise!
Break
these ties
I would say maybe
I shall rise I shall rise!
Break break
these ties
(so new here I hesitate massively to interject thoughts)
erikaj - Dec 16, 2007 7:57:28 pm PST #9603 of 10001
Always Anti-fascist!
Feeling very weird about some praise I just got for writing that I'm totally confused, lonely, and my life sucks.(I used prettier words than that, but still. I was on a deadline and therefore exploited my personal issues and now someone thinks I'm emotionally complicated instead of too lazy to make shit up) It feels both terrible and FG.
Susan W. - Dec 16, 2007 8:04:59 pm PST #9604 of 10001
Good Trouble and Righteous Fights
That's a wonderful piece, Erin!
Karl - Dec 16, 2007 8:13:29 pm PST #9605 of 10001
I adore all you motherfuckers so much -- PMM.
Agreed that praise for the quality of your expression of lack of fulfillment is a bit odd.
But then there were 20th-century novelists (Roth comes to mind, but there are numerous others) who made a career of it. So ... depends on which way you look at it, I s'pose.
Laura - Dec 17, 2007 1:41:43 am PST #9606 of 10001
Our wings are not tired.
They are your personal issues to exploit! Next time exploit someone's else issues and see if the praise feels different. Seriously, enjoy the praise without reservation. Yay!
Beverly - Dec 17, 2007 6:38:54 am PST #9607 of 10001
Days shrink and grow cold, sunlight through leaves is my song. Winter is long.
Erin, that's gorgeous!
Man, my insomnia never pays off that well. I gotta talk to my insomnia dealer...
Fantastic work, woman. Good onya.