I was under the impression that I was your big comfy blanky.

Oz ,'Him'


The Great Write Way, Chapter Two: Twice upon a time...  

A place for Buffistas to discuss, beta and otherwise deal and dish on their non-fan fiction projects.


deborah grabien - Aug 12, 2005 6:33:57 am PDT #3555 of 10001
It really doesn't matter. It's just an opinion. Don't worry about it. Not worth the hassle.

For the record, I do understand that deb never does that, (Thanks, Deb) but it's why I always look sideways at compliments

Correct. I don't - wouldn't occur to me. Having clocked time in an iron lung (twice) and wheelchair (twice) myself, I'm fairly insensitive about it. I don't do cheap compliments, or shed easy tears, or accept or offer physical gestures (handshakes, hugs, whatever) that I don't mean. Life's too short.

A tidbit for you: Back at the LA F2F prom, I was waving Nic's digital camera around, and there was a moment of relative stillness, a sort of lull. Nothing weird or "Oh, My!" about it - just your basic lull, happens when you get a lot of people in the same place and there's a lot of energy being expended. And I was waving the camera around, and thinking, huh, nothing interesting, and the camera found the one bit of motion in the entire room, and it was you. You were moving your head, I think - couldn't say, because the camera only caught the tail end of the motion. But I snapped that picture.

In re the chair? As I say, been there, didn't like it, and in your case, I quote Lillian Hellman talking about meeting Franklin D. Roosevelt: he was so interesting that I found myself seeing the chair as just an interesting way to get around.

And in other news, on topic completely, the first major outlet review of Matty Groves is out. From Kirkus, I omit the plot summary (they got it right, but it's always interesting to see what a reviewer focuses on), and just post the summation:

Penny and Ringan may be the most appealing couple of modern mystery, and Grabien again provides terrific historical tidbits


Astarte - Aug 12, 2005 6:55:14 am PDT #3556 of 10001
Not having has never been the thing I've regretted most in my life. Not trying is.

Fantastic, Deb.

And fascinating discussion about online revelations or the lack thereof. I'm fairly cagey about some things myself until I feel like I "know" my fellow posters well enough to guess reactions-good or bad.


§ ita § - Aug 12, 2005 7:31:56 am PDT #3557 of 10001
Well not canonically, no, but this is transformative fiction.

Remnants of a conversation that started in Bitches, I'm wondering about handling of dialect. I understand the true clunk of someone without an ear messing language up. On the other hand, I think some of the "simplifications" strip too much out. So I have a question:

How would you present this text:

"Mi a go look a lawyer because mi waan back mi wheelchair. Mi a go sue di police an' di people dem because mi waan compensation,"

in a story? Like that? Clean up the pronunciation?


Topic!Cindy - Aug 12, 2005 7:42:28 am PDT #3558 of 10001
What is even happening?

ita, is the spelling of Patois standardized in any way? If so, I'd stick with standard. If not, and I was assuming the readership was mostly English speaking people who (LIKE ME) weren't personally familiar with it, I think maybe I'd change the "mi" to "me", and assuming waan is want, I'd change it to wan' or even to want. I'd change "di" to "de". Mostly, I wouldn't write it, because I'm incapable.


erikaj - Aug 12, 2005 7:43:17 am PDT #3559 of 10001
Always Anti-fascist!

(Flushing from the compliments) ita, as it is a quote, I think I'd leave it, but I'm not sure how I'd tell her whole story, if she was a main character.


§ ita § - Aug 12, 2005 7:50:41 am PDT #3560 of 10001
Well not canonically, no, but this is transformative fiction.

I think there are a couple spelling methods angling for standardisation, but I'm not sure it's been accepted that there's even a need to preserve the form in written word (the assumption being that most people who speak patois a) shouldn't b) are illiterate, I assume).

I think maybe I'd change the "mi" to "me",

I can see that -- I don't think it would overly break the reading of it, except "mi" is used to mean "my" or "I" in that passage, and that might be misleading.

and assuming waan is want, I'd change it to wan' or even to want.

The presence of the "t" would just be wrong. He's not saying a "t," and he would be someone else if he were. "Wan'" could work, although it might take a Jamaican a second to work out what was going on.

I'd change "di" to "de".

Why? It's not pronounced that way, and it's not that much closer to the word it means, to my eye.

Mostly, I wouldn't write it, because I'm incapable.

Which is perfectly fair.

I'm not sure how I'd tell her whole story, if she was a main character.

I feel a need to trawl Jamaican fiction now, and see the ways it's being done, for various markets.


deborah grabien - Aug 12, 2005 7:51:03 am PDT #3561 of 10001
It really doesn't matter. It's just an opinion. Don't worry about it. Not worth the hassle.

Dialect is way the hell tricky; the problem with writing it down, if it's a dialect or patois you're really familiar with personally, is that cognitively dissonant split between you (author you) knowing how it sounds, and how it's going to get to the brain of the reader with no articulation as a signpost.

So I'm with Cindy; if a given word in a particular dialect or patois has the same pronunciation as the end reader's language, spell it in a way the reader will mentally interpret.

Short form, "mi" would probably be better as "me", assuming it's pronounced that way. Also, I'd remove the excess letters (caan), because the English language reader is mentally primed to see that as a typo, not a word. And there goes your best shot at holding their attention.


§ ita § - Aug 12, 2005 7:54:33 am PDT #3562 of 10001
Well not canonically, no, but this is transformative fiction.

"mi" would probably be better as "me", assuming it's pronounced that way

It's shorter than "me."

Also, I'd remove the excess letters (caan), because the English language reader is mentally primed to see that as a typo

That's a very good point -- but if you've set up with alternate spelling, haven't you altered their expectations? Risky, though.


deborah grabien - Aug 12, 2005 7:58:28 am PDT #3563 of 10001
It really doesn't matter. It's just an opinion. Don't worry about it. Not worth the hassle.

My main exposure to Jamaican patois were two brief visits and then a nice stint at Dolby in London. I seem to remember the "mi" sound as being closer to "mih" or "meh" with the long e, but it was a long time ago.


§ ita § - Aug 12, 2005 8:00:32 am PDT #3564 of 10001
Well not canonically, no, but this is transformative fiction.

If I'm reading that passage out in accent, the "mi" is terribly short, almost swallowed by the word that follows it. And the word itself isn't in a stressed position anywhere in it.