( continues...)

“Whatever Master Bernard requires,” says Kreacher adoringly. “Is Master Bernard wanting more chips, perhaps? With malt vinegar and sea salt? Or another packet of Benson and Hedges?”

And Bernard Black beams.

FINIS

OMG, Kreacher and Bernard, together at last! Perfect!

Brava!

Hee! The last scion of the House of Black may be a Squib (or possibly a Muggle?), but he's quite as shouty and toppy as Old Mrs Black ever was. I think it's a match made in heaven.

Hee.

That was most excellent.

Really wonderful.

What's builder's tea?

Hurrah! Thank you!

("Builders' Tea" is made from a 'normal' teabag [PG Tips, perhaps?] in boiling water, added to cold milk. It's your standard British beverage. Poncy middle class types such as myself might be swayed into buying fancy peppermint tea, to be drunk sans milk, or Earl Grey, to be taken with lemon, but The Great British Cuppa is normal tea with milk. And possibly sugar, depending.)

Builders' Tea" is made from a 'normal' teabag [PG Tips, perhaps?] in boiling water, added to cold milk.

So you add the tea to the milk, not milk to the tea?

So I started writing House/Sports Night post-show today. "Casey McCall found what he thought was anthrax in his place last night." Cuddy, looking more tense than usual, flipped the file on House's desk.

"And you've stopped wearing your wonderbra."

Cuddy sighed. House looked mock-innocent. "Oh, so today is not random facts day. Bummer."

"Who?" Thirteen asked, her green eyes wide as she studied the report from some hospital in Manhattan.

Foreman and Taub shot her "You can't be serious," looks in stereo.

"Guy's a sports reporting icon," Foreman said. "Might have won an Emmy if he hadn't been stuck on some third-rate network for so much of his career. Bob Costas should thank God every day that he moved into the political arena."

"And not only that," Taub said, shifting into his instructive tone as if trying to sell the already comely(if ultimately doomed) resident on a restorative nose job."To whatever extent democracy still exists in America, his commentaries deserve the credit."

"Okay," House said. "Could somebody give me a reason to take this case besides the fact that you all write his initials in your notebooks?"

"The network asked us to." Cuddy said. "Networks mean publicity, publicity means donors...unless you give him a dose of your usual charm. Besides, it'll be easy. he doesn't really have anthrax."

House took the file. "Ok, so in addition to Shroedinger's anthrax, he also has a twenty-three year old girlfriend. It must be true what they say on the internet...we smart guys are yummy."

"How is that relevant?" "Maybe it's not. But maybe I'm in love with this guy too."

So you add the tea to the milk, not milk to the tea?

I've heard that adding milk to hot tea scalds the milk but adding hot tea to cold milk warms the milk up gradually.