I remember being stopped by a flasher in a parked car in NYC who asked me through the open window "Do you want to see my dick?" at which point years of waspy upbringing kicked in and I said, "No, thank you." very brightly and kept walking.

Geez, men suck.

By the time most women get to be 21, they have a long list of events like guys following them through malls or rubbing against them in movie theaters or staring at them across a library or other creepy stuff. Makes us hyperaware.

Yep. couldn't agree more.

By the time I was 13, so many men had pulled their penises out of their pants when I was doing my paper route

This, however?? Note to self: if you ever have a daughter, she is not allowed to have a paper route.

Well, it's tough on the vast bunch of really nice guys out there, who just want to chat with a person without being treated to the cold shoulder.

When I was growing up, we had this local town phone book that listed the father's name, then his wife, and then kids and their ages. (Looking back I can't believe this, but anyway...)

One evening, when I was probably 8 or so, I answered the phone and this guy started asking me questions. The only one I remember clearly was whether I had hair between my legs and whether my mom did. My parents were really bothered by this and had our names taken out of the book. At the time, I was more bothered by their reactions since I had no hair between my legs and couldn't see why anyone would care.

Looking back now - creepy.

This reminds me of a Women's Studies class I heard about in which the professor asked, "How many of you have routines for walking to your car at night?" Every woman in the room raised her hand. Every man looked around astonished.

Well, it's tough on the vast bunch of really nice guys out there, who just want to chat with a person without being treated to the cold shoulder.

Exactly. Because, well, I do often nonchalantly "follow" girls around and keep stealing glances at them. But it's only because I think they're pretty and I'm waiting for some opportunity to fall out of the sky and let me talk to them. My penis will stay in my pants, promise.

By the time most women get to be 21, they have a long list of events like guys following them through malls or rubbing against them in movie theaters or staring at them across a library or other creepy stuff. Makes us hyperaware.

Yes, yes it does.

Nonian, I dealt with a similar obscene caller when I was at a similar age. Asked me all kinds of questions about "pussy" that bewildered me, because I'd never heard that word used for anything but a cat.

No, they don't, P-C, but not all of them are worthy representatives of Buffista men, just as not all women can pull off the tiara/snark/swordplay thing.

I like men, a lot. And I make a conscious effort to engage strangers-but frankly, it is a conscious effort still. I've been stalked and I was molested by a stranger as a 13 year old, and I'm a lot less likely a target than Ms. Barton.

So, it can make one a little wary, which sucks, because nobody should have to live that way. And, it means that you sometimes err on the side of wary, and miss out what could have been a really pleasant to wonderful encounter.

IJS.

Edit to make more of the sense thing all the kids are having nowadays.