Good thing she didn't get into "The Drawer" last night while you guys were over. There's nothing more disturbing than your toddler running around the house with a can of Pussy Whip in one hand, and the body chocolate paint brush in the other.

BWAH!

You still have the NOLA stuff we all bought you last year? Too funny.

Sure.

There's nothing more disturbing than your toddler running around the house with a can of Pussy Whip in one hand, and the body chocolate paint brush in the other.

Yes, there is. There really, really is.

Trust me on this one.

You still have the NOLA stuff we all bought you last year? Too funny.

None of it has even been opened. After the conversation last night, this should NOT surprise you.

"What the fuck's a 'top'?"

Penguins! PENGUINS!

(Penguins are the new Hitler.)

Don't make us come over there and force you to use your sex toys.

Those aren't sex toys. It's a drawer full of easily accessible condiments.

Don't make us come over there and force you to use your sex toys.

This is when vague pronoun reference is not your friend. IJS.

Read it three times before I realized I didn't have to leave my house as quickly as possible.

Those aren't sex toys. It's a drawer full of easily accessible condiments.

I'm not sure I want to come to your next BBQ.

No Pussy Whip on the weiner?

And you say you like kink.

Hmph.