Also, open cans of dog or cat food can cause projectile vomiting. IJS.

Also, for surprise -- there is always the spray hose on the kitchen sink.

Also useful for making the footing dangerous (I bet the garbage would work nicely there too.)

Boiling water could be a handy weapon too.

And then there's aerosol spray cans, which can be turned into impromptu flamethrowers.

Also useful for killing spiders, IJS.

Also useful for killing spiders, IJS.

Or you could lure them into the microwave.

Althought that wouldn't work as well on a human attacker.

Ah. Keep an empty beer bottle by the sink. Grab it by the neck. Crack it on the counter so you have a sharp, broken bottle and look crazy. He'll back away, and will likely sweep up the mess if you tell him to.

This is actually not such a good idea. Crack the bottle wrong, and, rather than a useful weapon, you'll end up with a palmful of glass shards.

Given the choice between that and Batarang, I think it's pretty obvious how I'd go.

Ergo, brass knuckles with blades sticking out of them are the answer.

This, somehow, reminds me of the recent presentation I did for my presentation class on "How to Defend Yourself from Vampires." I eventually decided that, as long as we assume that any blessed liquid qualifies as "Holy Water," then a blessed can of mace is the most convenient defense weapon for your average defenseless young pretty thing that likes to walk in alleys.

Protects from either muggers OR vamps.

I totally got an 'A' on that presentation, too.

In other news, I did not watch a movie today. But I strongly considered doing so.

Sean, I was talking tested principles. Some of which I've tested myself.

I asked a people at the krav centre, and I got looked at real funny. And told "Knife." with that why-are-you-asking-me-a-silly-question? uptick at the end.

These are people whose opinion on combat I trust. I don't know if my recommendation counts, because you don't trust my opinion, but there you go ... the krav-skewed opinion.

Speaking from personal experience, I think the most dangerous thing in Plei's kitchen is the coffee maker.

You're still really kind of missing my point ita.

You spoke to a bunch of people who really know what they are doing - something that makes a thousand times more difference than which of two or more possible objects are being used as a weapon in their hand.

People who don't know what they are doing, they're inexperience is probably more of a factor than the balance of the hammer or edge of the blade.

It seems to me that almost every other factor in a given situation besides which weapon you're holding in your hand is a more important factor than the weapon in question.

Crack the bottle wrong, and, rather than a useful weapon, you'll end up with a palmful of glass shards.

I will teach you how to properly do this, someday, Holli.

But you're very right about the shards. If an attacker breaks into your home, I bet you're likely to be barefoot and he's wearing shoes.

So anything creating a slippery or sharp surface, well, you've just fucked your own footwork worse than his.

Against an unarmed attacker, I'd want a knife, or mine own two fists, and my legs.

I did get attacked with a knife once. Threatened more like it, pressed against my belly in my own car. So I jumped out of the car. Had it been a gun, or a hammer, I'd have done the same thing.

Escape is the best option, if you can, methinks. I figured my chances were better on the pavement. Or at least, if run down by my own car, better than stabbed and raped by that fuckwad carjacking coward. At least I was choosing.