Oh, yeah. There was this time I was pinned down by this guy that played left tackle for varsity... Well, at least he used to before he was a vampire... Anyway, he had this really, really thick neck, and all I had was a little, little Exact-O knife ... You're not loving this story.

Buffy ,'Beneath You'


Buffista Movies 3: Panned and Scanned  

A place to talk about movies--Old and new, good and bad, high art and high cheese. It's the place to place your kittens on the award winners, gossip about upcoming fims and discuss DVD releases and extras. Spoiler policy: White font all plot-related discussion until a movie's been in wide release two weeks, and keep the major HSQ in white font until two weeks after the video/DVD release.


Lyra Jane - Jul 11, 2004 12:23:51 pm PDT #131 of 10001
Up with the sun

Tep, that's funny! We clearly know our film clichés.


Nutty - Jul 11, 2004 12:41:11 pm PDT #132 of 10001
"Mister Spock is on his fanny, sir. Reports heavy damage."

In re Spider-Man 2: the real problem with the whole el train in Manhattan question is not that [Lower and Midtown] Manhattan don't have an el train, but that the whole area looks exactly like Inner Loop Chicago. Like, if they'd taken plates of Midtown and pasted an el right into Fifth Avenue, it would have been more in the spirit of the movie's own fancifulness, and less jarringly "Wait, where the hell are we now??"

I mean, not if the el down Fifth ended at the East River, or anyway it would make New Yorkers just laugh harder, but the movie doesn't work as well if Spidey lives in Everytown. He lives in New York, even a fanciful New York, and he got no business rescuing poor dumb commuters in Chicago. Some other superhero can handle that.

May I ask why there is an Obi-Wan for Batman? Does every superhero get Obi-Wan now, like a gift with purchase? I am thinking, moreover, that Obi-Wan, as a trainer of superheroes goes, is sort of a bum deal for the superhero, so he should definitely come for free. Also, with an off button, for when he is haunting all over the place and the superhero has homework to do.


§ ita § - Jul 11, 2004 12:49:45 pm PDT #133 of 10001
Well not canonically, no, but this is transformative fiction.

Batman needs to be haunted, though. I think it's in the contract.


Nutty - Jul 11, 2004 1:04:17 pm PDT #134 of 10001
"Mister Spock is on his fanny, sir. Reports heavy damage."

But, like, whom would you hire to haunt Batman? The zombie ghouls of his parents, their brains drooling out of their ears? Or the dulcet tones of Alec Guinness, wafting gently through the landscape?

I think actually I would probably hire H. R. Giger to haunt Batman, or possibly John Wayne Gacy.


Matt the Bruins fan - Jul 11, 2004 1:09:03 pm PDT #135 of 10001
"I remember when they eventually introduced that drug kingpin who murdered people and smuggled drugs inside snakes and I was like 'Finally. A normal person.'” —RahvinDragand

If haunting is defined as stubbornly refusing to let go of something even after it's long dead, I think Adam West is the perfect person to haunt Batman.


Narrator - Jul 11, 2004 1:16:01 pm PDT #136 of 10001
The evil is this way?

In re Spider-Man 2: the real problem with the whole el train in Manhattan question .... he got no business rescuing poor dumb commuters in Chicago. Some other superhero can handle that.

Not so. We have no superheroes here. Don't need them. We have graft.


Jessica - Jul 11, 2004 1:20:07 pm PDT #137 of 10001
If I want to become a cloud of bats, does each bat need a separate vaccination?

I actually thought Badass was kind of a mess -- it needed to be either a straight biopic or a making-of mockumentary. (Or a straight documentary, even.) Trying to be both didn't really work for me. (Of the two, I'd have dropped the mockumentary stuff, because very little of the humor rang true to me -- it made the situations seem very trivial, which I don't think was the film's intent.)


Jesse - Jul 11, 2004 1:29:13 pm PDT #138 of 10001
Sometimes I trip on how happy we could be.

I'm going to copy from Nutty's whitefont, because I don't think it's a spoiler:

I mean, not if the el down Fifth ended at the East River, or anyway it would make New Yorkers just laugh harder,

That makes me think of Down With Love, where she gets out of Grand Central Terminal, is standing right under the Empire State Building, and then crosses the street to the UN. (Note: None of those things are adjacent in real life.) That made me clap my hands with glee! Or a similar, more dignified, reaction. It was such a great signifier that that movie was in fantasy New York, not boring old real New York. Loved it.


bon bon - Jul 11, 2004 1:38:33 pm PDT #139 of 10001
It's five thousand for kissing, ten thousand for snuggling... End of list.

Just got back from Anchorman. Anyone else see it? I have nothing to say about it. Nothing. But my throat and stomach hurt from laughing so much. My head also hurts, but I don't know if that's because if the laughing.

I saw it too. It didn't make me feel dirty like Dodgeball did, but it was also so silly that I don't have much to say about it, either.


Scrappy - Jul 11, 2004 1:40:17 pm PDT #140 of 10001
Life moves pretty fast. You don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.

it needed to be either a straight biopic or a making-of mockumentary.

See, I like when things get all shook up. I thought some of the straight dramatic scenes were over-written-verging-on-trite, but the other stuff didn't bother me.