In Natter 10, once an unnamed Buffista said she grew up near Earlham college, Gus then said that he "attended" Earlham. He does not say if he graduated, or if this was for grad school, or undergrad.

That would be me, an Earlham faculty brat; Earlham only has an undergraduate program, FWIW.

my hand was nowhere near her ahem.

Her... bittorrent?

You've totally seen us in the same room in different dresses. And my hand was nowhere near her ahem.

::phew::

Yeah, come to think of it you both looked fairly gorgeous that night.

Her... bittorrent?

It ain't bitty and it ain't torrential.

my hand was nowhere near her ahem.

Her... bittorrent?

I was going to say "puppet hole."

I have to say, the temptation to let your hand wander towards JZ's ahem is entirely understandable. It's just that good.

Oh, this would be sad. It makes sense considering the variety of 'cues' we don't have...in terms of reality checking with tone of voice, expression, etc. But some cliches just aren't true. It does NOT take just one bad apple to spoil the whole bunch.

Beej, I meant to respond to this earlier. It's not one bad apple for me--I was a bronzer before I was a buffista and was there for Penlind. That probably colors my opinion on this issue but it's reinforced my need to know as much as I possibly can to feel comfortable with what I "think" I know about the people I interact with online.

I was a bronzer before I was a buffista and was there for Penlind

Cash, the first time Cindy posted the words "I Googled," my brain jumped straight to Penlind and I started worrying about all the Bronze alums here and how it was pinging them.

FWIW, I Googled too, as soon as kimi posted -- not out of hubris but, as everyone else did, out of fondness for Gus and the desire to see someone else's remembrances, some word from someone else who'd known him and taken pleasure in him. And I'm way, way late about this, but thank you, Cindy, for starting this conversation. It is necessary, and thank you for it.

Cashmere, I'm so glad you brought my comment back around. I have to apologize because I was unconsciously talking to myself there, and should not have dragged you into the fear I'm holding at arm's length.

I completely get being cautious after having bad experiences. Since I have had bad irl experiences with fabricators and such, I too have that caution and just don't want to think I need to be watchful here. This place is a big part of my recreation and edification, and is so very different from other online groups I've seen (and run swiftly away from), I just jerked my knee.

Please excuse.

Ah, no worries, Beej.

What's sad is that regardless of the outcome, just the spectre of a doubt is enough to change how people look at the board and their interactions with others. It's understandable to want to NOT get into that. To NOT hash it out a la buffistae would be easier but I don't think it would be prudent.

YPMV.