isn't there some point where people have to refrain from jumping on him? Wouldn't that point be post-apology?

Yes, please. Excoriating someone after an apology is just nasty.

I'm sorry Sean. None of the several points in my post have anything to do with whether or not you're confusing something you aspire to as a career with what you actually do. I feel a great sense of sympathy for your work predicament, I've gone for a week or so without being able to find temp work while unemployed and scared, as well. It's stressful.

Allyson, I honestly can't tell if you're being sincere here, or incredibly patronizing.

I don't think that Sean's job title is relevant to whether or not you think he was rude to ita. No one living in LA or NYC should have to show their artistic cred card before being allowed to take offense when a politician slams their city.

Allyson, he actually said his career was in filmmaking, which I understood to mean that he makes a living off of movies. And isn't that what he does?

I understood it to mean that he was currently employed as a filmmaker.

I want my career to be in writing, but am a secretary.

Allyson, I honestly can't tell if you're being sincere here, or incredibly patronizing.

No. New to LA, couldn't find a steady job, went without temp work and a way to make rent, utterly terrified.

Holy carpe diem.

You are referring to yourself as having been a dick, right? Cause if you meant it the other way it's pretty damn offensive.

Not Allyson, but I'd bet even money, any amount, that she meant the former. She has always been as harsh and blunt in her examination of her own blow-ups as of anyone else's, and she values this community. What I got from that statement of hers was that she holds Sean responsible for his reactions and his blowing-up precisely because she's done the same in the past and likely will in the future, and she knows in her calmer moments that her reactions and her blowing-up are her responsibility.

Gah. All the ill-feeling is making my stomach twist. I came to the original kerfuffle late and will totally cop to the fact that even if I'd come to it in time I probably wouldn't have said anything, not because it's okay to blow up at ita but because I'm fairly in awe of ita and hesitant to speak up for her when I know she can do so on her own behalf so eloquently. Which is possibly not such a great course of action, as it leads to stomach-twisting on ita's part, which is no good.

And now there's the new kerfuffle. So, yeah. Sean did make a full and unqualified apology, and IMO Allyson is being blunt and rough but not unsympathetic -- Sean's clearly hugely upset in a way that she recognized from experience, ita's her friend, she needed to say her piece. Dragging it out further feels like picking at scabs.

Huh, Sean has worked for me on a few Hollywood projects, I also know that he's worked as a script supervisor.

Very few folks that work in filmmaking or the related industries do it full time. They work gig to gig and very often go long periods between those gigs. As far as I'm aware the last full time job he was working was with a production company or something along those lines.

It certainly sounds like he's working in filmmaking to me.

Not Allyson, but I'd bet even money, any amount, that she meant the former.

Thanks, JZ. I'm trying to not be a dick, and did that thing where I composed in notepad and reread what I posted and edited what I thought could be interpretted as lashing out/vengeance.

But am still clarifying. Unless that's causing more trouble. I see where Jessica sees patronizing, and why, and since I was trying to say, "hey, feel your pain, however..." I needed to address that.

It certainly sounds like he's working in filmmaking to me.

Me too. After awhile it turns into hairsplitting. Was I a writer when I decided that I was going to finish a novel come hell or high water? The first time I got paid for my work? When I decided not to go back to work after having Annabel and freelance? Or am I not a writer until I either sell a book or make enough from my freelancing that I wouldn't instantly have to get a job if anything happened to Dylan? I don't know. All I know is AFAIC I'm a writer. A professional writer, too, though not yet an author. And if someone says they're a filmmaker, as long as they're making a good-faith effort to work in that field, that's good enough for me.

And if someone says they're a filmmaker, as long as they're making a good-faith effort to work in that field, that's good enough for me.

I understand your position.

Oh, gah, I should have just said that I was going to also question Sean's post, and not have gone into detail about what I was going to say, because the conversation has become about that, and it's not what I thought was the important thing. What I was trying to get across to Sean is that the bothersome part of his blowup isnt so much that he had the blowup, but that he then blamed ita for his rude behavior, and demanded an apology from her for making him behave rudely.

It would have so much better to just say, "We are soley responsible for what we post. No one is controlling our brains as we compose them and hit post."