Calling it a pecking order (or a gazebo) won't change a thing.

I don't know. Calling it a gazebo, might change a lot. Think of the metaphor!

HEC: Your gazebo needs re-roofing.
CINDY: Well, some of the paint is chipping off of your gazebo.
HEC: My gazebo is bigger than your gazebo.
CINDY: Yeah, well my gazebo provides cooler shade.
HEC: What.Ev. My gazebo is octagonal.

I posted (once) in the first Buffy thread.

Also, Sean, KristIn. I know, I know, she doesn't seem to care, but she should! It's a name! It's hallowed!

Thank you ita -- I do care. I just don't generally see it as worth making a fuss over.

No hard feelings, Shawn K. (evil grin)

Thank you for caring, Kristin. Otherwise I look quite insane, and we can't be having that, can we?

Steph: I was just thinking that there are a lot more Buffista-specific words that aren't in the FAQ.

Dana: I think that's the sound of someone volunteering...

Tina: I have a list started and will add to it as people throw em out there. If they come with definitions and/or Nilly'd links to their origin - all the more helpful.

Oh - Steph - if you want to do this - please do. If not, I have no problem doing it myself.

If you already have a list going, then feel free to continue!

Also, perhaps the FAQ should acknowledge that there are groups of people who IM all the time, email all the time, journal all the time.

I don't think that's a great idea -- it just enforces the "Cool kids/cabal/b.org Illuminati" myth.

The social capital concept-- and I wasn't a big fan of the term first, either-- is not used to justify rude behavior, which is what you're suggesting, Java. I think what you're seeing is that it's often used to excuse it. In other words, yes, you've been rude, but we overlook it because so far, it's not particularly indicative of most of your experience; plus, you've proved that you're not ruining everyone's experience daily. And I'm OK with that. This is a clique. It's not a democracy.

What Shawn said, w/r/t social capital. It exists in meatspace, so why on earth wouldn't it exist in an online community that has the level of friendships (and marrying each other, now!) that we have?

I'd even go so far (and is why I'm synonym-happy on the topic) that "social capital" is used to describe a perfectly normal phenomenon. So whether I ever speak those words, there's public goodwill/understanding that carries weight AND it's something that can be gained or spent.

"Pecking order" doesn't inherently express the idea that I can move around in it. "Gazebo" might, if we work it right and start early.

It's not a democracy.

So true. The "citizen" analogy is often used, but ... so not a government here. It could never be.

I ike the slug line w/ etiquette sample.

"Pecking order" doesn't inherently express the idea that I can move around in it. "Gazebo" might, if we work it right and start early.

As in "Wow, when Lee picked up the dinner check for everyone, she added a whole new wing on her gazebo!"