Jumping in here is sometimes a lot like double dutch, and it's hard to get the rhythm.

Tina and Ginger are me.

I have lurked since TT days, with the occasional smattering of posts. A while back there was a discussion about making the site navigation easier for newbies and I wanted to say, how about toning down the "welcome wagon", but did not know a nice way to say it, so I kept quiet.

I adore this forum, hence the lurkage, but there are times when it feels like if you are not part of the inner circle, you are not welcome.

Frank! What's all that green on your face?

t ducks flying bowl of guac

I wanted to say, how about toning down the "welcome wagon", but did not know a nice way to say it, so I kept quiet.

Could you give an example of what you see as "welcome wagon" behavior? I think I know what you mean, but I'm not sure.

Much has been said here by many people. There's no need at all for me to weigh in. So my opinion is that things really weren't handled that badly by anyone concerned. Granted, my previous board (like many people's) was more flamey than this one, but really the level of smackdown here was piss-weak compared to some of the stoushes between longterm members in this very thread.

Not that I can blame Beej either, things look different from the outside. And tone is a tricky thing, yo, as is quite likely exemplified by a whitebread uptight Antipodean saying 'yo'. There were hand gestures too. I'm pretty sure I got them wrong.

I agree that things have become pricklier of late, and I do think that's largely driven by external events. Ah well. We do still seem to be able to add newbies to the list of regulars. There's bound to be an element of luck involved. I don't doubt there are people who'd fit in here fine, but got off on the wrong foot and so it just never clicked.

Ultimately, I think reminders of basics like general courtesy and thoughtfulness and all that are useful, but I don't think there's any systemic problem here. Just maybe an unfortunate incident of indeterminate origin.

And now we can all marvel at just how superfluous this post really was. Oh, and FWIW, I'm glad I took the time to get past newbie status. I like it here.

I don't think this is a newbie issue, per se, but it's magnified because it happened to a newbie. As others have pointed out, smackdowns happen, but when they happen to the Old Coots of the Phoenix(TM), we don't come over and discuss it here (meaning the right-hand threads).

Okay, Beej, a newbie, got smacked down. On the other hand, KristinT had the best de-lurking day ever, and has been a delight ever since. If we'd been harshing on all the recently-new folk (of which there are a decent handful), then I'd say we're a bunch of dicks toward newbies. But that hasn't happened, and we're not.

Also, I suppose it's worth noting that I tipped over the guacamole a couple of times when I showed up, at least once that got me snarked about quite heavily. A good many of those people who snarked about me on that occasion are among my favorite people here, and are (from what I understand) pretty fond of me, too.

Quiet, you!

This is in the site ettiquette, by the way:

There are no short cuts to fitting in. And when you're one of eight hundred registrations and a couple of hundred active posters? The onus is going to rest entirely in your lap.

Good to remember.

There is tone, and yes, it may be in the eye of the beholder, but it's still a factor.

Seconded. Choice of words also sets a tone.

Yes, indeed. Tone is WAY more than vocal inflection. From how incredibly articulate we all are, that should be obvious.

Frank! What's all that green on your face?

Who put all these bowls of guac on the floor? It's a trap, I tell you. And avacado death-trap.

Well, see, this is why I had not posted the comment back then, and I really hesitated about posting it now. I don't have a solid example to cite.

Some newbies have come in and been welcomed with open arms, KirstenT comes to mind. But this is quite the exception.

FTR, re-reading the Minearverse, I don't think Beej was jumped on either. Had she hung around for a post or two after her dramatic exit she might have gotten a better sense of what we're about.

Had she hung around for a post or two after her dramatic exit she might have gotten a better sense of what we're about.

Yeah, but that tends to ruin dramatic exits.

Tone is WAY more than vocal inflection. From how incredibly articulate we all are, that should be obvious.

For example, I could consider this to be an obvious shot at me.

But I won't.

(Honest. Just pointing out that it really isn't as obvious as the poster might think.)