With a group this large and diverse (we are not homogenous, not really, even though most of us seem to be pretty liberal), there's no way we're going to avoid ever hurting or getting hurt. I don't think anyone should NOT speak up, but we can't expect people not to get hurt or not to be offended or not to hurt. Impact may trump intent, but intent does matter. Talking it out, in the spirit of knowing that none of us intends to hurt one another, is the only way to deal with it, short of people just leaving, which no one wants.
But I don't see how having a special thread meant to educate people in isn't going to turn into a penalty box. I think the idea is that people would want to go there to learn about how they affected someone in a spirit of embracing growth, but I just don't think that's how most people would respond to being directed to the hurt-feelings-discussion room. Especially not in the heat of a painful emotional moment.
We're a found family, for some of us an intentionally created family. Nobody can hurt you like family can. Sometimes you talk it out and hug it out in an intentional embrace of the pain and the knowledge that our relationship is worth the pain. And sometimes you keep quiet and live with resentment forever, which... yeah, I don't recommend it. I wish I knew how to keep anyone from ever getting hurt again, but my origin family is pretty damn dysfunctional, so all I've really got is awareness of how it goes wrong. I'd really rather this family didn't.
Long post, considering I meant to not say anything.
edit: I took so long to post it, it may not even matter anymore.