Dreams are so weird like that, with people who are gone. I had one, too, that has left me weirdly emotional.

Last night i dreamed that i woke up and my family had arrived to help me move in, including my brother, father, sister (not speaking to me), a couple random aunts and uncles, and my mother (deceased last year) and her mother (deceased fifteen years, Alzheimer's for ten before that).

My grandma kept falling and it was supposed to be funny somehow. I knew she and my mom were really dead and I wasn't sure who else could see them, but I didn't want to say anything out loud in case they disappeared.

Also, of course, I was not fully dressed and was totally unprepared and for some reason my parents brought both dogs and a new pitbull puppy named Pistachio.

This morning I went and got my tools from my old job, came home and a friend helped me organize for a couple hours. She's gone and I am shaky and sweating. But i went through my craft stash pretty ruthlessly and now have a space for stuff i will need in the first three weeks.

I just have to actually pack the stuff.

I hereby declare Buffista nap time.

My Mom's 78th birthday is this month, and she texted me and my brother to say that she wants Amazon gift cards because she's planning to buy a pair of Doc Martens.

I think I'm going to have to buy a pair of Docs, because I can't let my Mom be cooler than me.

She and my stepdad just got back from 2 weeks in Scotland, so I feel like there's a story she isn't telling us about falling in with the punk scene in Edinburgh.

Dreams are so weird like that, with people who are gone. I had one, too, that has left me weirdly emotional.

After not dreaming about JZ for many months, I've dreamed about her twice recently. The last one we were at a party and she was upset with me about something, but when I tried to talk about it with her, she set her mouth shut and shook her head "No." Like, "No, we're not talking about this now at this party but I'm definitely mad at you."

I woke up anxious to talk to her and resolve the situation until I realized she wasn't beside me.

So it goes.

I hereby declare Buffista nap time.

I'm actually feeling kinda perky right now.

I made another roasted vegetable hash with soft fried eggs on top, and have already checked in online and downloaded all three boarding passes to my phone. Productive!

I got to see my friend Eleanor yesterday, who was just returned from her honeymoon in Bali. Her wedding day was the same as the Memorial so we had commiserated with planning stress on the lead up to our respective events.

I got more detail about her wedding, and my favorite story was about the lead singer in the wedding band.

Eleanor's in-law side of the family was talking all during the toast by Eleanor's beloved sister. The lead singer, a badass rocker with a wolf cut and leather pants, took the Mic and addressed them after saying, "I have a sister and giving a toast can be a very vulnerable experience. It's extremely disrespectful to talk over her during the toast." Then she pointed at Eleanor's sister and said, "That was beautiful."

So sometimes the angel you need in the room is a woman in leather pants and a fuck-it attitude.

She and my stepdad just got back from 2 weeks in Scotland, so I feel like there's a story she isn't telling us about falling in with the punk scene in Edinburgh.

I need that story and you need some Docs!

Last night I dreamed I was in a vacant lot in Manhattan, and I found all these Christmas presents lying around, and it turns out it was supposed to be an art installation by some other artist, who never appeared in the dream, yet somehow I knew all about him. I was arranging the artwork in the lot, and then I noticed that they were about to start construction, so I found a different vacant lot to set up the arrangement. And then people started coming in and enjoying the art, yet still I felt melancholy and lonely, I guess because I felt underappreciated.

I very rarely remember my dreams.

My sympathies for stressful dreams. I hate waking up all worn out and upset after those, the opposite of rest

Yay docs! Imagining Teppy's mom combining yoga and head-kicking is amusing me

I remember that my last dream of the night/morning was low-key stressful, but not why. I woke up with a racing heart and a feeling of "I need to get back in there and figure it out," but no memory of what it was that needed my figuring.

My last vivid dream was Ethan insisting fervently that we had to move to Hartford CT, and me asking him variations on "But why? What's there?" and not getting any satisfactory answers. I have ZERO idea where this came from.