I'm sorry. You were going to ask me to choose, right? Did you want to finish?

Zoe ,'War Stories'


Natter 77: I miss my friends. I miss my enemies. I miss the people I talked to every day.  

Off-topic discussion. Wanna talk about corsets, duct tape, butt kicking, or physics? This is the place. Detailed discussion of any current-season TV must be whitefonted.


Jesse - Apr 11, 2021 10:59:11 am PDT #5492 of 30000
Sometimes I trip on how happy we could be.

I was just trying to think why I never took typing, because a lot of my friends definitely did, and it's because I always took voice classes as my elective. I would take whatever she was teaching in the time slot I had free.


DavidS - Apr 11, 2021 11:15:28 am PDT #5493 of 30000
"Look, son, if it's good enough for Shirley Bassey, it's good enough for you."

There was a partner at the Big 4 accounting firm I worked at who told me that for most of her career, all the way until she made partner, she never let anyone see her type. She was a speed demon, but she knew as a woman in a male dominated industry she would immediately get categorized as note taker rather than active participant in every meeting.

I knew a woman who was a programmer who refused to change the toner on the printer for the same reason.


Sophia Brooks - Apr 11, 2021 12:54:04 pm PDT #5494 of 30000
Cats to become a rabbit should gather immediately now here

1. Honestly, I think the reason I hung on to my theatre job so long is that I wanted to write Costume Designer and not secretary as my occupation, and what enabled me to leave was being able to write Insttuctional Designer

2. On the other hand that it problematic, because good secretarying and AAing is really hard and should be valued more and probably pay and be recognized more.

3. It used to drive me crazy when people refused to learn something for that reason (nurses with the fax machine, for example.)

4. But for awhile after I got my new job, I refused to be the one setting up group meetings, getting the room and taking notes, because I thought I would get stuck.

5. I still have a lot of guilt because I think I did a much better job and had more responsibility/power and authority as an AA. Being the assistant of a woman I was so on the same wavelength with was amazing for me, and since she had power and trusted me, it was easier to get things done.

6. I think I took on a costuming job for the summer. I think I already regret it. A friend of a friend was advertising, but it is Shaw and unpaid, so probably terrible. I said I would either stage manage or do costumes, and I think I would rather be stage managing. But we shall see. I am hoping COVID lets up, Nigel will travel, and Katie will let me use the costume shop/stock as I am so used to throwing money at costume problems, so it will be another change. Also, personalities in community theatre tend to make me nutty. I get that they don’t usually get a real designer and want to do their own thing, but sometimes it hurts my eyes when they are all together...


Laura - Apr 11, 2021 1:05:17 pm PDT #5495 of 30000
Our wings are not tired.

Sophia, I get all of those 1-6, completely! In a perfect world people would be respected and treated fairly. Alas, this is not our world. None of it makes any sense.

I go back and forth on getting involved in my community theater. I've only shown my support with donations and attendance, even when I wasn't that fond of what they were performing. They have pretty much stayed performing, but it is like a couple dozen people in the audience, or less. Maybe next fall when I get back from NY I'll actually volunteer.


Vortex - Apr 11, 2021 1:16:04 pm PDT #5496 of 30000
"Cry havoc and let slip the boobs of war!" -- Miracleman

When I was in academia, there was always a passive agressive war about who takes notes. Sometimes I would be in a meeting with a bunch of PhDs, who would look to the non-doctorate in the room for that bullshit. I once had to say something like, "I'm happy to take my turn occasionally, but I can't participate in the meeting and take the kind of notes that would helpful to anyone but me. If you think that there is more value in me taking notes than participating in the meeting, then it sounds like I don't have anything meaningful to contribute and my time would be better spent elsewhere."

Which sounds like a huge flex, but it was in response to the asshat who would "misremember" what was decided in the meeting and just do what he wanted. When that shit happened (with stuff I cared about), I would respond "my notes say . . ." He said "well, if you take such good notes, why don't you do it for every meeting?"


Theodosia - Apr 11, 2021 2:31:01 pm PDT #5497 of 30000
'we all walk this earth feeling we are frauds. The trick is to be grateful and hope the caper doesn't end any time soon"

Thank goodness my job doesn't involve a whole lot of meetings. That's another reason to be happy with it.


Matt the Bruins fan - Apr 11, 2021 2:31:07 pm PDT #5498 of 30000
"I remember when they eventually introduced that drug kingpin who murdered people and smuggled drugs inside snakes and I was like 'Finally. A normal person.'” —RahvinDragand

WTF? Was this man never an actual artist? One of the reasons that I abandoned my dreams of acting was that I found out that fewer than one percent of the actors in SAG made enough money to support themselves.

Yeah, even as a teenager I was practical enough to see which way the wind blew on earning a living as an artist and leaned into Graphic Design classes. I like to eat, and nap on my own couch rather than someone else's. You have to have lots of talent, self-discipline, drive, AND luck to make it in the fine or performing arts.


Calli - Apr 11, 2021 3:01:19 pm PDT #5499 of 30000
I must obey the inscrutable exhortations of my soul—Calvin and Hobbs

good secretarying and AAing is really hard and should be valued more and probably pay and be recognized more.

It use to be that a secretary was a valued role. Almost an apprenticeship in some cases. Second sons would be secretaries for people high up in politics, learn the craft, make connections, etc. Then women started getting secretarial roles about the time that typewriters became standard office equipment. The role was devalued and took on the clerical aspects it has today. But Secretary of State, Secretary of the interior, and so on are reminders of a more elevated time. No one is asking Anthony Blinken to get coffee for meetings.


Atropa - Apr 11, 2021 3:22:29 pm PDT #5500 of 30000
The artist formerly associated with cupcakes.

I can't participate in the meeting and take the kind of notes that would helpful to anyone but me.
I've occasionally said very similar things. Thankfully no one has pushed back on that at this job.


Sheryl - Apr 11, 2021 3:57:40 pm PDT #5501 of 30000
Fandom means never having to say "But where would I wear that?"

Timelies all!

Tired. This week's gonna be tough. Gary has building code hearings all week, which run from 10am until 8 pm most days. He's not "on" all the time, but there's gonna be a lot of times I have to deal with Mr. S on my own. Like now. I'm about to start his bath and getting him ready for bed. sigh...