Yes, been a bit. I'll go ahead and send an email.

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We could use a piece of good news, right? My friend T, the one who was with me almost every day when my dad was dying, helped find a temporary foster for my dad'd beloved dog Sunny...and they want to adopt him permanently! It's a loving home with T's friend, who works from home four days a way, his live-in girlfriend (who doesn't work and loves animals more than people), 7 and 11 year-old kids, his mom (former animal rescuer who lives in the back house), a giant doofus of a dog named Tank, and a bunch of cats who are not scared of dogs. They have a HUGE (like, an acre) fenced yard, and apparently Sunny has been happy and EATING (he barely ate for two weeks when Dad was in the hospital), and the kids are in love with him. Friends, it's a perfect home for him. And I'll still get to visit him.

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That's wonderful news, Pix!

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Oh, that is such good news, Pix! So glad to hear it!

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Friends, it's a perfect home for him. And I'll still get to visit him.

That's fantastic! I still think about Ginger's dog, Mr. Peabody, who I got to meet.

so glad Matilda is at a place to join, and that's a beautiful way to phrase it -- knitting a new way to be together

I remember the exact moment my Dad told me I couldn't cuddle with him anymore before bedtime. I was like...6? And it felt shitty.

So when we had Emmett I decided, "I'll let him let him decide. I'll always hug him but I'll respect his space and physical person. But I won't turn him away if he wants to get in my lap." Which he did until he was bigger than me and kind of crushing me.

And with a teenage girl, I'm even more conscious of letting her set the boundaries.

It's not a super common occurrence but three or four times a year she'll come stand over me and it's clear I'm to make a space for her and she wants to get in my lap.

Last night she did that and she said, "You know, I'm probably not going to get any bigger so I'll always fit on your lap so can I do that whenever?"

And I said, "That sounds about right, so whenever you need to go ahead."

She gave a little Victory fist pump, like it was something she had been worried about.

That was sweet.

Tonight she came up to me in my reading chair and said, "I need a hug."

This was clearly a standing hug request. So we hugged and it was a long, strong hug and when we pulled back she gave me such a rueful look. Just full of the fucked up sadness of losing Jacqueline and knowing/trusting that I also felt that.

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(Not gonna lie -- I've so appreciated reading people's kind comments about my questions there and most recently, too. That really gives me a warm fuzzy, you guys, and makes me feel useful... which, who doesn't love that? [Even though I don't have actual answers.] So, thanks for saying.)

You ask *amazing* questions. They are quality and insightful. Next big unknown, I am asking what your questions are. Because they are insightful and quality. Like I said.

...and they want to adopt him permanently!

That is fantastic! I am thrilled for them, Sunny and your Dad because he loved Sunny so much. And dogs understand, to whatever extent, death. Sunny can go and have new family knowing how much they were loved and loved in return.

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Friends, it's a perfect home for him. And I'll still get to visit him.

Great news for Sunny! I'm so glad to hear that.

I woke up with a burst blood vessel in my right eye, which has no other symptoms, so I got a surprise when I looked in the mirror. The white of my eye is entirely blood red. I look kind of freaky but also kind of badass. (Pinkeye is pretty different-looking from a burst blood vessel; pinkeye is not this very dark red. I mean, if I develop any other symptoms, I'll call the doctor, but I think I just sneezed or coughed too hard and my delicate baby blood vessel went kablooey.)

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had almost fired me for being in a bad mood last week

There is NO situation where this is a valid fireable offence. JFC.

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Oh, that's great news about Sunny, Pix! I kind of want to live there, honestly... sounds like fun!

Steph, a rapid and uneventful return to the natural state of the eye for you. That is such a strange thing when it happens -- it looks so "Ahhhhhh!" but, as you say, it's normally no big deal, so you get the weird, "Oh, my GOD! Oh, wait... no," moment. Nice jolt to your morning.

Love that fist pump for Matilda. So sweet. A parental lap of comfort is a beautiful thing.

I think I have turned a corner yesterday/today in shingles pain management. Seems to have receded to a very dull roar, and I think I can deal with just Tylenol now.

It is so... I don't know what the word is. When DH had pancreatitis pain, they practically threw handfuls of oxycodone at him when he asked for pain relief. I think the shingles pain is certainly comparable. I probably watch too much TV, so I feel like I'm doing something wrong if I ask for a narcotic pain reliever even though it's, you know, to relieve pain. "Just Vicodin, and only at night... I'll stick to Tramadol or Tylenol during the day..." WTF? I mean, it's not an unreasonable plan, but why did I feel the need to, like, bargain for Vicodin?

Something about men and pain being taken more seriously is sticking in my craw. And I 100% know that race is a huge issue there, too. Ugh. I get that it's fraught and a many-faceted problem. I'm not actually whining for myself - I got what I needed. It's just... and then I think of... you know... and RAGE.

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Okay, so I am actually going to have Tim come home from work and take me to the hospital out of an abundance of caution. My blood pressure has spiked and I'm pretty dizzy. Most likely case is that I just need my BP meds adjusted, but I'd like to continue my streak of being a Lang who *doesn't* have a heart attack or stroke in their 50s.

I feel like I deserve a gold star for actually following the advice that I would give to someone else, because normally I am pretty lax when it comes to my own well-being, and believe in the power of taking ibuprofen.

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