Those were the days.

I was not emotionally mature at 17 in a lot of ways even though I seemed that way. I would have benefitted immensely from a couple of gap years working

O hai, it me! And the school eventually agreed and I got rusticated for a year, came back part time, and failed out again. Got a couple three jobs, took a class or two, and eventually went back for real, for serious, about 5 years after my HS grad date.

I could not have fathomed doing anything other than going directly to college out of school - my mom, to her credit, would have backed me if I had wanted to do otherwise.

17 is so young. 20 is so young. There is time. The doom spiral is a danger if it really takes hold but it sounds like Alex is navigating that already so I’m betting he’ll be just fine.

Pix, that's so hard. Caregiving is a rough gig, especially when it's someone you love who is suddenly very different than the person they were.

Atropa, your dad is all right now, yes? And hopefully making sure to tell you when something is going on?

Plei, I'm sorry it's going to be a rough holiday.

And {{{hugs}}} to smonster for so many reasons. I know it hurts like a motherfucker right now, but you did a really brave thing ending that relationship.

We have a “bitches and complaints” section of our meeting but, you know, this is why people don’t want to bring stuff up. And he’s the only one allowed to actually be grumpy and only his wife (also works there) can check him for it.

I think I may have suppressed a scream here! Why do people not understand the value of actual communication? I can't even.

He was literally a captain on a big vessel, and has worked on boats since he was 19. So he’s used to, if someone uses up his patience, calling up corporate and getting them to send someone new. I got frustrated on site with him one day and was going to walk it off during my break and instead he sent me home and i was told not to come back until Monday and so I lost a quarter of my paycheck on no notice, while I was helping support R and kids and had been for months.

They have been extraordinarily accommodating of me in other ways, but I’m sick of this crap and our 19 yo employee is close to quitting. There’s an older carpenter about to start and I am fascinated to see what happens if G treats him that way, or if new dude puts up with the two of them bickering.

ETA thanks, Amy. one of the reasons I totally lost my shit in Oct/Nov is that for a while I felt like I had no agency at work, or in the apt, or at the cabin. It was bad. I was having intrusive thoughts, wanting to punch things constantly and, well, I was driving over a 23-mi bridge twice a day. I’m used to intrusive thoughts, but never so frequently and never so strong. Plus I was having nausea and getting migraines again.

So yeah, I miss R terribly and I hope somewhere in the multiverse there’s a version of us together, but I had to go. Whether or not they pay me back will tell me a lot about how right I was, but I’ve already seen them rationalize not paying their old bosses back, so.

I feel like the crash in 2008 really changed things, and ever since then it’s been do more with less etc. and I guess getting older and getting more “important” jobs, or in my case, one that doesn’t involve a computer at all.

Also, we were younger. And smartphones didn't exist. Which...I think is part of it, sort of? I dunno. I feel like being online takes more bandwidth now because we're constantly connected somehow, and ::waves hands::.

I MADE IT TO THE POST OFFICE TO GET MAILING BOXES! I PRINTED A LABEL! Now I just have to tape the label to the box and pop the box in the big blue box and then I will have FINALLY mailed something I intended to mail in, umm.

September. But anyhow, now I'm allowed to open today's mail.

Tim had been kind of dubious about the necessity of heated seats in the new car, and then yesterday when he came home from work, the first thing he said as he walked in the door was "You were right—heated seats are awesome!" Cold butts no more!

Go go heated seats!

There is no coffee in this house but I don’t have time to go get any before I have to start working. Sadness. Thankfully I am off after this for the rest of the year. Ish, because I don’t really have backup and have to keep checking my email and hoping nothing urgent comes up.

Go go heated seats!

My C-Max came with heated seats standard, and I didn't care one way or the other when I was deciding what to buy, but I came to appreciate them that first winter when I discovered that they delivered heat many minutes before the conventional heater did. It made the first part of my commute *so* much nicer (exterior parking, no garage).

Heated seats are one of the greatest inventions in the world.

I was not emotionally mature at 17 in a lot of ways even though I seemed that way. I would have benefitted immensely from a couple of gap years working

O hai, it me! And the school eventually agreed and I got rusticated for a year, came back part time, and failed out again. Got a couple three jobs, took a class or two, and eventually went back for real, for serious, about 5 years after my HS grad date.

This is basically Emmett's path. He started college when he was 17, turning 18 that first month. And he fucked off and fucked around and fucked up the first two years. He got bounced to the community college and at age 20 the pilot light in his brain turned on and he really started getting into his studies. He was focused and taking so much in, and his grades were good and he did that for about three years (working part time so not taking full loads) until the lockdown hit.

And online college classes were not engaging to him and long after the lockdown ended, his school had not returned to in-person classes. Then he had terrible difficulty transferring back into his four year school in the major he wanted and...thats why he and his gf, Kalena, were getting so depressed up in Sonoma. Neither one of them have finished their degrees yet.

Now he's leaning towards becoming an electrician.

Emmett was definitely not ready to go to school at just-turning-18, whereas I was eager as hell to get to college at the same age and soaked it all up.

Matilda is taking a gap year. Which we had tentatively planned on one even before JZ got sick. But there was just now way to focus on college applications this year.

So neither of my kids are going to have the educational experience I had, or Jacqueline had.