But it is so easy for me to come up with excuses not to meet up with people. And it's gotten so much worse since COVID.

Same here. If I didn't have more extroverted friends in my apartment complex, I'd have a lot of trouble connecting with anyone. But proximity is proving very helpful.

I posted all this to remind myself that I am getting out and doing stuff, and things aren't as bad as they seem, or feel for me sometimes.

That sounds like a really good day. I picked up the new L&R yesterday!

I never learned how to do this. It's so fucking hard for me.

Just think of all the people being deprived of your Scola-ness!

I enjoy your company. And frequently I'll be walking around the City taking in some architectural detail and making a mental note to point you and your camera at it the next time you come through.

And I am so lonely it feels like physical pain sometimes. But it is so easy for me to come up with excuses not to meet up with people. And it's gotten so much worse since COVID.

Your neighborhood bar used to be such a good option for you. Some regular contact and people who knew you.

I'm sorry it's been so hard. You deserve friendship and intimacy.

But proximity is proving very helpful.

Proximity is the most underrated thing affecting quality of life!

Seeing the doctor today at 11. My face is itchy and burning and bumpy again this morning, but Benadryl and Ibuprofen got me through the night and I expect they'll start to work soon.

My face is itchy and burning and bumpy again this morning

Cool washcloth? Ice pack? Rip your face off much like the 1997 American science fiction action thriller film directed by John Woo?

I'm glad you're seeing the doctor today, because that sounds unbearable.

David, what lotion did your doctor recommend? Because in addition to cool washcloths, you may want to pick up some Aquaphor lotion. (Beloved of my tattoo artist!)

Proximity is very underrated and something that sucks about being an adult.

But it is so easy for me to come up with excuses not to meet up with people. And it's gotten so much worse since COVID.

Even I, your local extrovert who knows everyone, have been having a hard time since COVID. There’s less going on, people are less willing to go out/do things/meet up. I am lonely a lot. Doing stuff like dancing (where I can just show up and see people every week) is helpful, but not the same as good friendships.

Tom, I’m so sorry you’re dealing with that. My ability to force myself out of my house has gotten much worse since Covid too, even when it’s to see “my people” I always feel like canceling at the last minute. I was very proud of myself for going out yesterday and even being on time to pick up Thessaly. Then when we were out I had someone short some inspirational bullshit at me from across the parking lot, and I remembered that I didn’t have to deal with any ableist bullshit when I never left the house. The first time someone said something ableist to me post Covid I was taken by surprise because my armor against that kind of thing was rusty from disuse.

Remember in Sixteen Candles when she says "He's been here five minutes and he's got somebody. I've been here my whole life and I'm like a disease." That's me and Phoenix.

Remember in Sixteen Candles when she says "He's been here five minutes and he's got somebody. I've been here my whole life and I'm like a disease." That's me and Phoenix.

I have had this thought MANY times re me & San Diego.

Aw, sorry to read that. Both because my vacations there were nice and made me wonder about living in it, and because that feeling sucks and I guess I'd rather play the hits and think about What's Wrong With Me than think other people live like that, even today, misted in anti-choice tears as I am. Like, I have *comrades* here....if I wanted to know the local state of Medicare for All(meh) or invite somebody to that awful Caregiving Commission thing I'm on--there's nobody so inclined I hate that much-- but that I've got. And the neighbors are helping us, and the staff of two bookstores knows me. And a few used-to-be-friends that, like, make me pay every time so I don't call them(Although that's not really the only reason...it's the simplest, though.) But friends here? Not exactly.