I haven't much to say. I've just been sitting, and reading and loving this far flung community and absorbing the knowledge that Jacqueline is no longer among us, feeling a bit of the absence David and Matilda and Sunny are dealing with, listening to the stories and memories we're all sharing.
I always find it impossible to cry in the moment of death, in the aftermath of death. It's weeks, even months later when the reality penetrates and I lose it. So I'm not crying, but I am sitting with grief, and it's good to be able to do that here, with you all.
David, you and Matilda have all my love.
Arthur update: We're going home today, without pulse-ox monitor (yay) and as a normal, if noisy, baby. I am all packed up except for the frozen breastmilk I pumped for the overnight I let his dad cover (turned out to be a Really Good Idea as he had to fast from 3 AM for surgery and Dad is much better at coping with that kind of thing, since the equipment and biological impulse to FIX IT is not physically installed)
Just waiting on paperwork and for him to wake up for his final nurse exam.
This is the space where my "comfort in" sentiments would go if I were not emotionally tapped the fuck out.
Yay going home but you definitely deserve a lot of rest that you probably won’t get! Fresh baby is exhausting anyway but you’ve had a ride for sure! Hope things improve and settle down from here Debet! And that people are able to help you out, friends and neighbors?
Yay for Arthur going home!
We've got 3 grandparents in town, meara, plus a half-dozen well-invested aunties and uncles who are more than willing to help as they can.
And just having a second person I can hand off to without having to track them down like I do the nurses will be huge.
Good, good news, Debet. Excellent.
Bring that baby home!
Reporting from the other end of the lifeline I’m at the mortuary signing papers and getting death certificates.
They have cat art on the walls.
Im amazed by Matilda’s self awareness and self compassion, but really I shouldn’t be given who raised her. She’s a good human.
Excellent news, Debet! Sounds like you have good local support, that is so crucial.
The resistance is strong in this one, so I must be on the right track.
Ugh, beekaytee, why do you have to call me out like that? I was just slightly rude to someone who offered condolences but called her Jackie, and who has gotten on my nerves in the past, and then I thought “Jacqueline would have been nicer about it, maybe even in a funny way.” But I decided I didn’t care enough and don’t have the spoons.
I took today off and my bosses told me to take tomorrow, too, which means I have a 5-day weekend. I’m in town for Decadence for the first time in forever (so of course Vortex is sitting this one out, sadface); R and I are getting haircuts at the alien rave salon and then going to wander the Quarter, probably window shopping Fleuvogs and lingerie and rings until the parade.
I’m still in a lot of pain from my bike fall so I’m seeing an ortho on Sat morning. I expect it to go, as they usually do, “Welp! Nothing for me to cut on, go see a PT.”
ETA link to the alien rave salon and boutique. I’ve had my hair cut there before by someone named Pizza wearing a red and yellow outfit with suspenders, a jaunty beret, and feather fake lashes. They were booked so we are being seen by the more prosaically named Rebecca.
[link]
Debet, I’m so glad he’s able to go home today!
