JZ, I'm sorry. That all sucks so much. I know Covid and the holidays made everything difficult at hospitals, but this feels like such a long time between detection and taking care of the damned cancer. I would be scared, too. I don't know if they'll give you anti-anxiety meds on top of opioids, but don't be afraid to ask. Your fear is grounded in your diagnosis, but I'm all for not feeling fear.

How is Matilda?

I am so sorry JZ. I wish this was all easier . Anti anxiety medicine sounds like a good idea if it's possible.

I'm still kind of struggling with feeling very...I don't know....it makes me wonder if I actually do need to be on an anti depressant. I don't want to be because...I guess I'm stubborn. But I don't want to do much lately so I'm kind of...trying to figure things out. I don't like Jan and Feb as months go they just kind of end up being full of melancholy and feeling bad or sick.

Only good news I have is E is back on a swim team for his school district. When they first moved to VA the only swim team options were highly competitive outside of school and not want he wanted. But now that he's in 8th grade (!!l) he can be a part of the high school swim team...kind of. There are some meets he can't do but others he can. So he is on the young end of it and he's had 3 meets so far. The first he came in last place which I know disappointed him but then he got 2nd place and this weekend he got 3rd and 3nd to last. I don't know the details but I think he's enjoying it and it's only in the winter so less chance he will burn out on it.

I've been thinking about volunteering at the Recraft store i shop at all the time. I want to wait until my hours bump up at work so I can adjust to that but it's taking forever to get the doctors note to work. I think this week I'll stop by ask for more details.

Well, I have good news, kinda. We have another grandchild. Gabriel Garcia (my last name) was born last Tuesday. The kinda part is that my son just this afternoon bothered to text me and let me know. At least with a picture. I expect that someone that he talks to pressured him into letting his mother know. I asked him how the mother was doing, but no response. So, grateful to know he was born as we knew he was due a while ago, but a painful reminder of our estrangement, like I don't think about it every day.

Ugh that sucks Laura. I’m glad you at least eventually got the info and pics but yeesh. That sucks.

Congratulations on your new grandchild, Laura! Sorry the surrounding circumstances are fraught.

I'm glad you have a healthy new grandchild, Laura.

Timelies all!

Congrats on the new grandchild, Laura!

Congrats Laura!

Congratulations, Laura--I wish everything about it were different, but I'm so glad there's a new little human in the world who is a little bit of you and Brendon. Prayers, always, for healing and reconciliation.

Thank you, everyone. I was getting somewhat concerned that I hadn't heard from anyone that he was born and knew he was due in early January. Who knows, maybe having 2 sons now he might gain some perspective.