Thank you so much. It's been so heavy on my heart. Kristen is really supportive which is enormous. Huge life change. And it's all so precarious. My older niece (11) picks out her ensembles for school and styles her hair and brushes her teeth in the morning. My nephew was s an early riser so he usually gets her out of the crib and plays with her in the morning while my mom makes breakfast and packs her lunch. Everyone has been helping. My sister-in-law is a saint for helping to care for her, too.

So much love to you, Allyson -- you are a wonderful human

Y'all, I put a meeting on my boss' calendar for tomorrow morning, to quit my job. I feel like this may be a terrible plan, but I just can't anymore. I need some time to de-stress and figure out what I need and want to do with myself and the job is the easiest part to remove (harder to fix, but also I just don't have the energy to search for a job while doing this one!). I think I will plan to take the summer off (potentially applying for a job or two if anything looks really good) and then decide if I want to just apply for essentially the same job I have now, or do anything super crazy.

I hope the time away from work proves useful, meara .

Timelies all!

Love and strength to you and your family, Allyson.

Hugs for all who want/need them.

Allyson, your niece is lucky and blessed to have such love and support from you and your family. And if every parent was required to be 100% all the time and never have doubts, no one could be a parent! I hope you get to adopt her. May it all work out for the best for all of you, especially her.

meara, go for the gusto. When it's time to quit, it's time to quit.

Speaking of the gusto, I was supposed to go back to work today, but no one informed IT so my computer is still locked, the help desk said talk to my manager, my manager can't/won't talk to me until HR says so, and HR hasn't responded to my messages. HAHAHA Fuck it I went back to bed.

You've been unhappy with the job for a very long time and work is too much of our time for it to be misery. When thinking about tough decisions you look at the possible best outcomes, and worst outcomes, and decide if it is worth the risk. Your happiness is worth a lot of risk.

Allyson, it's a whole lot, but she's so lucky to have family like you & yours ( and that includes Kristen.) It's a lot of change for you guys, but for her it will hopefully be just a blip in a life of being loved & safe.

meara, may this be exactly what you need.

Allyson, pretty sure that if you are considering taking that step, then you deserve her and she deserves you. You and your family are good people.

meara, seriously, who wants to be miserable that constantly? I hope you find something good.

Zen, surely going back to bed was the right decision.

Thanks everyone. I'm sure I will seriously second-guess myself a lot, but I'm telling lots of people in part so I can't chicken out!! It's kind of a sudden decision, but yes, I've been very unhappy for a while, and think this may just be what's needed.

Zen, going back to bed sounds very nice.

Allyson, would you be moving to be near family, or would the baby come to where you are, or am I misremembering where everyone is in this? I hope it goes more quickly and easily for you than for others I've known, and that your brother eventually understands you are doing the best thing you can in the situation, for the kiddo AND for him (harder to have a relationship with her if she is adopted by non-family members!)