People. Some white dude married to an acquaintance of mine who I've hung with casually a couple of times at parties and such just reacted VERY BADLY when I commented that, no, people of color can't be "just as racist" as white people. I tried putting it into historical context. I explained I've been studying this for 10 years and seeking to broaden my own perspectives and suggested a couple of books he might want to check out. His response was the most condescending, arrogant, mansplaining and insulting dismissal of my intelligence and education I have EVER experienced. Dude, I KNOW YOU. I WILL SEE YOU SOCIALLY. TRY to at least be civil. I really had to walk away before I ruin my friendship with his wife, but I AM SO PISSED.

Or emotionally exhausted. Also feeling that.

Pix, that sucks.

Not enough wypipo get that racism isn't simply prejudice. There is a big divide between those of us who understand that it is is social/political/econonic power plus racial prejudice and those who do not. until we can get it into their heads that the power component is a necessary element of racism, discussions involving "reverse racism" will be as productive as trying to convince vagina guy that vulvas are a thing.

Thank you, Andi.

Direct quote from his comment: "regardless of your enlarged sense of intelligence...." and then a very condescending section about how because I "don't know" him, I am not an expert on this topic. Despite saying I've spent the past ten years educating myself about it.

He's a condescending asshole and made it out that I was "talking down" to him.

I shouldn't care. But no one has said a thing in my defense, and it's disheartening. I really can't say anything else without stooping to his level, but I'm feeling angry and defensive about the fact he insulted me, white-mansplained racism and had no consequence. Am I seriously the only white person who will call him on his bullshit? Because that's a much bigger issue than my hurt feelings.

I'm so sorry, Pix. I'm not sure which is worse, the personal insult or the knowledge that such people exist in our closest circles. I'm sorry you didn't get backup and that he couldn't hear what you were saying.

I've tried to not engage with family members on such subjects because I know it will only escalate and I have to see them socially in the future. eta: yes I am a non-confrontational coward.

Was this on Facebook, Pix? Because we could send an army over to take him to task.

This is my method, but I am married to a man who doesn't really believe in the extra sheets, so instead of stripping the bed and making it again right away, he does all the laundry and remakes the bed with the same sheets. Which is so much more work! (OTOH, he does the laundry and then makes the bed, so it's not like I'm COMPLAINING. But it's so weird.)

I do this, even with our two extra sets. I tell myself it's so the mattress can air out a bit, but it's more that I don't want to have to go through hauling out the container with the sheets, pulling those out, folding the newly-washed sheets, putting those in, and putting the container away. (We don't have a linen closet, so storage gets creative.)

Steph, that wedding sounds like it will be a blast, and I love those shirts!

Pix, I'm sorry.

Uggghhhh, Pix, that sounds terrible.

I can now confirm that she meant NEXT Saturday! Since she's not here now. (To give me a massage, still the most indulgent-feeling thing I can imagine.)

I'm sorry, Pix. Good on you for trying, I hope someone in that circle shows up for you or that's gonna get pretty uncomfortable IRL

ETA jeez my phone typing has deteriorated lately!

Thank you for the closure, Jesse!

I'm going to a Vintage Clothing Fair today and I am really truly not intending to shop. I just want to look. I'm usually on the prowl for something when I go to these things.

I have a bunch of stuff on my list today. Right now I am about to head out to wake my son who isn't responding to phone calls. Part of what I have to do is putting blades back on a fan that was disassembled months ago when a ceiling was painted. Son is 6'6" so it seems like I shouldn't have to drag a ladder in there to do it myself when he can just reach up and do it. Also I need to go places and don't want to leave the dog alone and need him to dog sit. Maybe he can get her to eat. I have had no luck at all. Vet appt is Monday morning but I don't know if she is going to make it that long. And DH is gone to basketball stuff until late afternoon! Feeling overwhelmed and frustrated.