Zenkitty, I'm going to assume that sentence ends in alligators and say no, not the only one.
I swear, one of these times, you're gonna wake up in a coma.
Cordelia ,'Showtime'
Natter 76: Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Foaminess
Off-topic discussion. Wanna talk about corsets, duct tape, butt kicking, or physics? This is the place. Detailed discussion of any current-season TV must be whitefonted.
-t - Nov 17, 2019 9:05:12 am PST #13611 of 30019
I am a woman of various inclinations and only some of the time are they to burn everything down in frustration
Zenkitty - Nov 17, 2019 9:07:22 am PST #13612 of 30019
Every now and then, I think I might actually be a little odd.
yes. alligators
Steph L. - Nov 17, 2019 9:09:15 am PST #13613 of 30019
this mess was yours / now your mess is mine
Alligators help with a LOT.
Zenkitty - Nov 17, 2019 9:46:40 am PST #13614 of 30019
Every now and then, I think I might actually be a little odd.
Pardon me, I need to emotion-dump.
I am struggling bad with depression and anxiety since I got laid off and my cat is dying and my other cat now seems to be sick also and I'll never be able to walk without pain again and I feel like I'm losing everything and I guess I really need therapy and an antidepressant and I really can't afford therapy right now and I really don't want another antidepressant that might not even work with all its inevitable fucking side effects.
I'll never get another job that pays anywhere near as well as my last one, and I am bitter about the sudden lay-off and scared that it means my impostor syndrome was right after all. I know I'm not the only one who's ever lost a job suddenly and had to find a new one. Part of the problem is, it's happened to me before: 25 years ago my life fell apart and I lost my job and my house and my car (and my girlfriend died and my boyfriend went to jail), and I had to give my cats to my mom and move in with my sister. I cannot do that again. Granted, 25 years ago I didn't have a 20-year career on my resume, but I was 25 years younger and able to live on far less than I need now. Y'all, I'm terrified.
-t - Nov 17, 2019 10:08:28 am PST #13615 of 30019
I am a woman of various inclinations and only some of the time are they to burn everything down in frustration
Oh, Zen. I'm so sorry. That's a scary situation to find yourself in and it must be worse having been through such badness before. I am confident that your impostor syndrome is not right. You have skills. I know you give your cats a good home as long as you have them.
Sophia Brooks - Nov 17, 2019 11:09:20 am PST #13616 of 30019
Cats to become a rabbit should gather immediately now here
Oh Zen, I so relate. That is totally what I am scared of. All I can say is the Buffistas helped me see my value and also that I value you
Also, thanks others. I think I am ready to set a lunch date with my sister. She seems so eager. I cannot talk to my mom about this right now. I will never be ready to talk to my mom until it is a done deal, because she catastrophes upon me already catastrophising.
Laura - Nov 17, 2019 11:46:20 am PST #13617 of 30019
Our wings are not tired.
I'm sorry, Zen. It really is a lot from multiple directions. You really do have valuable skills and I hope you find a good option soon.
Zenkitty - Nov 17, 2019 11:57:33 am PST #13618 of 30019
Every now and then, I think I might actually be a little odd.
Thanks, guys. I only just now connected what I'm feeling now with what I went through back then.
Maria - Nov 17, 2019 12:08:18 pm PST #13619 of 30019
Not so nice is that I'm about to ruin a Friday morning for a bunch of people because of a series of unfortunate events and an upset foreign government. - shrift
I'm sorry Zen. Your brain is wrong. I'm confident that a great position is just around the corner.
Zenkitty - Nov 17, 2019 1:55:23 pm PST #13620 of 30019
Every now and then, I think I might actually be a little odd.
It's a relief to hear my brain is wrong!
Maybe I need to tweak my resume to place less emphasis on the copywriting/proofreading and more on the process/project management. I'm a little concerned because directly managing people was never part of my job description, but I did it on several projects that my boss handed to me (because she didn't want to do them), and I'm not sure how to represent that on my resume without implying something that isn't true. Like, I never made hiring/firing decisions, I just... told people what to do? And made sure they had what they needed to do it. And sometimes loomed over their desks until they gave me what I needed. What, I'm tall.