Huh. Things I didn't expect to happen today: I got asked to be on the Community Advisory Council for a center for people with disabilities. Seems like the center does all kinds of different stuff -- advocacy, research, job training, lots of other things -- and the CAC is a group of disabled people and family members and other people who have meetings four times a year to discuss what the center is doing and what else it could/should be doing. The person who runs it has seen me posting disability rights things in local political groups, and things that this CAC could use more political advocacy. (I'm looking through their webpage, and seeing a couple things that are making me say, "Um, wait a second," but I'll see what it's like.)

I also joined the new (as in, founded two weeks ago) Ohio chapter of ADAPT, and I'd like to go to some of their protests, but the guy in charge has been going through this endless string of, "OK, I'm going to need anyone who can make it in Cincinnati on Tuesday." "New plan: Columbus on Friday." "Cancel that: we're taking a multi-pronged approach, Cincinnati on Monday, Cleveland on Wednesday, and Lexington on Friday." "Cancel everything else! Everybody in Columbus on Wednesday!" Like, dude. We need actual plans here.

Wow, he's really taking that name to heart.

My brain has been a mess for hte past couple of weeks. I haven't wanted to admit the likely reason, that today is the third anniversary of standing in a hospital room and making the hardest, most inescapable decision of my life. I don't know why I want so hard to convince myself that I've moved beyond being torn up by milestones. I don't hold it against myself when I'm hit by grief out of nowhere.

Three years. A lifetime. Just a little bit ago. I keep having to double-check dates to be sure how long it's been. I'd best just get home and lock the door and play out in my mind my fantasy of burning that hospital to the ground as his pyre. I entrusted him to their care, and they failed me. (don't bother with logic and 'they did all they could' and all that. The place still stands, and it's still one of the best in the world, but it burns in my mind)

That just sucks, Connie.

billytea, Daniel got me to thinking.... duck-billed platapus is an oddly specific name, does that mean there are or were non-duck-billed platapuses?

I'm so sorry, Connie. I hope you can give yourself permission to grieve however you need to. Maybe sans arson.

Let me guess, her initials are TH? I left silently a month or so ago and I have no regrets. Got tired of her constant posting. It wasn't any kind of home for me any more. I like the splinter group better, white as it is.

God, I'm so tired. I cannot wait for this project from hell to be over. Client is furious with me and I'm none too happy with them. Yes, it's taking me forever, but I have been exceedingly transparent, am losing money, and they are getting a top quality job for a third of what it should have cost or less.

Connie, I get it. It fucking sucks. Do what you need to get through the day.

smonster, yep. I'm sorry for the suckage.

(Splinter group?)

That would be the initials. (Echos amych)