Am I letting down the team if I say no to the PIO at AHCCS(AZ Medicaid)? Because healthcare is important to me, and I want to bring attention, but, at the same time, I'm not really looking to be The Face Of this stuff(And I'm already on one ugly website for our attendant-care agency...don't ask.) i said yes to everyone all summer because I felt like the disability perspective was not being articulated, but I don't feel quite the same about it now...and I thought that speech earlier in the month was, you know, The Biggest Deal, worried about it for weeks and then it was a very minor deal indeed.(Not that I do things, like, looking for my closeup, or what have you...I hope you guys understand that.Just having limited mobility puts pressure on everything I can get to to be The Best, even when I know intellectually, many things are quite ordinary. Another thing that sucks for me, is that when I say yes to things, it's kind of like *we* say yes.(And my mother would very much prefer planting herbs in a window box than telling our life story again). Sometimes it's worth fighting past all that, sometimes I have to pull an Elsa and put it aside... Not sure what to do in this instance.

Am I letting down the team if I say no to the PIO at AHCCS(AZ Medicaid)?

Nah. You're doing a lot, and if this doesn't seem to you like it's important enough for the effort it would require, then trust that.

I've been using my wheelchair on campus more often, because the one on-campus class I'm teaching is across campus from my office. I've been experimenting with ways to get my chair in and out of my car, but I've concluded that I need to get a lift. I just don't have the strength or the height to lift it myself, and the ramp that I thought would fix the problem didn't. I asked around with other local people who use wheelchairs, and they all recommended the same place for buying and installing a lift, so I'll call them tomorrow. And one of my coworkers says that he'll help me with it until I get the lift installed.

Hil glad you are able to get some help until you can get the lift installed. I hope that goes smoothly

can I have some come home kitty~ma

M's kitty Duchess got out last night. He messaged me this morning and said his roommates left the door open and she escaped again (second time in about 2 weeks) and he couldn't find her when he went calling for her/looking.

I'm hoping she'll miss him and come back but he's worried she's hurt someplace or worse

Come home safe, Duchess!

Hil, I'm glad the wheelchair is helping you so much.

I have to Get Things Done and I don'wanna. Eleven hours on the road Tuesday made my ankle swell up huge and it still hurts. sigh It'll be all right, I just wish I could lie on the couch today instead of going out in the heat and humidity.

Duchess is found! She just wandered back up from where ever she was.

Thanks for the ~ma

Yay for Home-Duchess. Don't scare your fam like that!

I do think there's an expectation to participate in the theater around dying and public mourning, an excitement and titillation that has been cultured by various societies.

The theater around dying. Yeeeaaaaahhh. I totally see that.

I've always known that the end was nearer than anyone expected. Today was the first time I thought 'this might be it.'

She is still able to take a few steps, but the quality of life is essentially gone. She must be down to roughly 75lbs. There is no coming back now.

She is trying to hold on until her granddaughter comes next week to 'take care of her for a couple of weeks.' She keeps saying that the granddaughter,"NEEDS this."

I feel terrible thinking it, but I almost hope the dear one slips away before then. The granddaughter may get a learning experience out of it...goodness knows I did when I was a couple of years younger...but the child has not seen her granny since she weighed roughly 60lbs more. That was in December. I worry that the shock will mean that my friend dies in distress.

Who knows, it could work out perfectly. But, I've been asked to backstop all the maintenance stuff, which I'm more than glad to do. I would not want her to suffer one speck more than I can prevent.

Glad the kitty is home! Don't run out the door anymore, silly Duchess, okay?

ltc had her school orientation today, and she was the only kid who wasn't even a little bit shy. All the others spent at least a little time hiding behind their parents. My kid walks in, says hi, and starts playing with the toys. Where did this social being come from?

Bleargh. Long day, lots of pain. Need to call the wheelchair lift place, and the foot and ankle specialist doctor, and now the tire pressure light on my car came on, so I need to make an appointment with the tire people, too, because I'm sure it's another nail. And need to work all weekend to get stuff ready for next week. Blah.