I'm sorry about all the ailments plaguing the Bitches and their friends and loved ones.

I'm feeling (once again) woefully inadequate to work in the industry I write about. I am at a beer festival in Atlanta, and although I did try to do an after-event thing last night, I couldn't do so today. I just prefer hanging in my hotel room by myself. Also, the beer festival itself was somewhat weird - I'm feeling increasingly uncomfortable in such white spaces, especially white male spaces.

So, I'm pretty much hating on myself, because I'm alone (Tom is home) and feeling like my self-care maneuver is actually laziness/stupidity. Ugh, sorry. I just needed to vent a little bit.

{{Bitches}} Sending an abundance of love. I'm sorry that you are dealing with so much.

Nora, I am not sure this is something to feel bad about. If you can get the info you need during the actual event, you can skip the after event. MY DH usually skips the gathering/party/drinkfest from auto launches. He got back to his room and writes or watches ESPN. He doesn't seem to feel at all bad about it--saying getting drunk with the people he writes about is never a good idea.

Scrappy = wise!

I spoke to the daughter of dying Friend this morning, with my heart in my throat. It could mean the end of the friendship but I could not, in good conscience, keep my promise to keep quiet.

Despite being dismissed last night, I went this morning to get my friend out of bed. Thank God I did.

In addition to the Scopolamine, she is taking Reglan and, dear lord, I've never seen such aggressive, drug-induced tremors. Affected all her limbs. If she's tried to get up alone...I shudder to think.

She has agreed to take off the Scopolamine, and I was gratified that the daughter noticed changes over the phone that validated my in-person experience.

I don't know what will happen from here, but I've done my best.

Drugs can be miracles, and sometimes, the price to pay for them is just too much.

Bonny, was the scopolamine for nausea? Because there are other anti-nausea drugs, and they might have a better side effect profile. (Although she may have already tried them and I missed that.)

Steph, interestingly, the Scopolamine is for excess secretions.

She's had the top of her stomach removed and two stents put in to keep the esophagus open enough to get some food in. (tumors pressing against the esophagus)

She was spitting into tissues pretty much non-stop. The drug worked for that, but she also has a lot of reflux (of course) and nausea that was not mitigated.

I wonder if the Reglan wouldn't be so bad on its own, but I'm not sure she is strong enough to test that theory.

BKT, wishing strength and peace to your friend. What an awful thing to go through, as if she weren't already enduring enough.

So, update on the gastroenterologist saga: the nurse practitioner from Awesome Doctor's practice called me with the MRI results (which were normal), and so I told her that I didn't feel like the gastroenterologist even listened to me, etc., and I thought he jumped to an endoscopy/colonoscopy really quickly. She said that she was expecting that's what the next step would be, since there's no way to know for sure what's going on in my (increasingly expensive) stomach without looking inside.

But she totally validated my discomfort with the gastroenterologist for not listening to me, and gave me a couple of names for gastroenterologists to get a second opinion, but she said they would probably also want to do a endoscopy and colonoscopy.

So, I still feel like the tests are overkill, but if I see a second gastroenterologist who actually listens to me and they recommend the tests, I'll do them.

This is a lot of fuss for one small organ. Sheesh. (And look, I realize that I have a LOT of privilege to complain about the health care I'm receiving. We have good insurance, and all of my doctors so far have addressed the actual problem and didn't try to tell me it was because I was overweight, and I've gotten the tests I need quickly and easily. I am VERY lucky compared to a lot of people in this country because of our fucked-up health care system. I do know this. But it's still annoying to need all these tests.)

Endoscopy/colonoscopy are fairly common first steps IME. Good luck with finding a doctor that listens to you.

Today is my last day with mother's helpers. I'm so sad they have to go back to school. I have to do all the laundry while they're here. Because there are no clean clothes in the house.