Mom's birthday is tomorrow . She's in Florida visiting a friend and also taking care of her townhouse . Her friend went off for the weekend so my Dad is taking her to dinner tonight to one of his favorite places.

Mom worries sometimes that my brother and I struggle with relationships because she and Dad have been divorced for so long and we didn't grow up seeing a marriage work. I keep telling her watching them develop a relationship as a divorced couple and parents is a good model.

Strike two is a red flag. I don't do doctors who don't listen to me. No one should.

Sing it, Vortex!

I am helping a friend through the dying process and, no matter how many times I do this, it never ceases to amaze me that certain doctors simply can't slow their roll enough to listen to an 84lb woman express pretty much the last few choices she will have in this life.

When I was so sick a couple of months ago, I ran into one of those in the emergency room. Even with a 102 fever, I was able to demand a different doctor. The original one came back to apologize, helped I'm sure by the fact that I recorded our entire conversation.

I keep telling her watching them develop a relationship as a divorced couple and parents is a good model.

So wise, askye. It's a gift that you can tell her that.

I recorded our entire conversation.

Can I ask, how you did that? On your phone? Out in the open? I may be shortly in a situation where I want to record a conversation, and I've been fretting about it.

you can get recording apps for your phone. I use two, one for phone calls and one for face to face conversation/interviews.

Can I ask, how you did that? On your phone? Out in the open?

Yep. On my ipod, in the open. I don't necessarily shove it in the other person's face, but I don't hide it either.

In this case, I had the ipod, screen up, so you could see the voice recording app, if you looked.

He did not notice until the part of the conversation where I demanded the new doctor and he fought me over it. I picked up the device (which was plugged in to the wall as recording burns the battery quickly) and he looked kind of stricken. Then, like he needed to fix it. Which he did.

I am so over people not being true their word, or offering poor service, that I have no qualms about being upfront about my need to protect myself.

That was what finally brought my landlord into line. I recorded EVERYTHING and then published a site on wix with photos and videos. I then shared the url with inspectors, lawyers and city officials.

I did all of this rationally and without the vitriol I actually felt. It got results. In fact, my attorney...the fifth in 2 years...tenant work is thankless, yo...said that mine was the best documented complaint she had ever seen.

Truth.

It does a body good.

beekaytee, I am so very happy you have found this strategy to advocate for yourself.

Good for you, bee.

Good for you !!

Mom gave herself heat exhaustion and did not go to dinner.

I asked her not to work today and she said she had to. I pointed out she can always go back to Tallahassee to work on this stuff or stay a few more days.

She's not sure . But she promised to take it easy tomorrow.

Thanks, askye, WS and Zen. It was a hard won win.

I realized that the fear of what might happen, or of making the landlord angrier was very, very familiar to me. This dude is not my father, but I was shaking and vexing all night and such.

I just decided to stop being angry and to start be methodical.

Well, I survived two four hour car trips with the object of my affections, just the two of us...when Friday night she had "officially" become girlfriends with the girl she's been dating. Sigh.

But, I mostly had a good time at the big lesbian softball tournament. AND, I even ended up participating in the after-dark naked slip n slide! (It was not an actual slip n slide, it was a tarp that was like, ten feet by 30 feet. And lesbians lined up on either side hooting and hollering and helping people not slide right off the sides...) Wasn't sure I wanted to but glad I did. Fun with friends. Amusingly, a friend's wife saw me and came over and was like "wait, you went down the slip n slide? I missed it! Go again!" and my friends thought she was hitting on me, which I didn't realize, so they were like "OMG why did you tell her no??" Hah. Anyway, the bunch of us didn't stay up super late, and instead went back to our hotel and watched a bunch of American Ninja Warrior. And my friend's team got second place in the tournament!

Also just booked a trip home to Indy and will drive up to a friend's wedding in Ann Arbor.