Hitting 50 has triggered a lot of contemplation on age on my part. It's hard to know people are preparing to package up your life for disposal, to know you're classified as "A problem to be dealt with" and not "Fully contributing member of society who is master of their own life." I listen to the ads on TV and the radio, and I know I am irrelevant to advertisers, except in cases of incontinence, general decrepitude, and funeral arrangements. Oh, and maybe the occasional expensive vacation, if I happen to be older and wealthy. The fun ads are aimed at people 20 years younger than me. I resent them. I resent having my life and experiences shuffled off the cycle of relevance.
I'm grateful that I was able to convert my life to a stripped-down version while I'm still young enough to handle these things on my own. I'm young enough to build something relevant for the next 15 to 20 years, before I become a situation to be dealt with.
None of this is of any help on coping with aging parents, though. I am selfishly grateful that I was spared the decisions for my own parents. I have deep sympathy for the people who have to deal with this. Transitional stages of life are hard.
Connie, if you were a man the Cialis ads would still be treating you as a desirable customer! You'd get to have massages and take outdoor baths by beaches or scenic waterfalls!
Oh, I was actually thinking of sexual dysfunction as well. I miss Smilin' Bob and his commercials with the wood paneling backgrounds.
Pretty sure that Connie's post was actually about her feelings and only tangential to your stuff, Tep.
I didn't think it was a criticism of our situation! I probably worded it badly. Let me edit.
t edit
Actually, I just deleted it, to avoid misunderstanding. I wasn't trying to argue or anything.
Timelies all!
I guess I should be thankful my folks are still able to do the snowbird thing, and plan on doing that as long as my dad's able to drive.(My mom doesn't drive anymore as she has lost her peripheral vision) They will both be 77 this year.
In a sort-of-related-to-this-conversation context, my mother just said to me, "I don't think you're very neat." Seriously, mother?!?!?! I would say I'm about as neat as she is, but in different ways. Also she has a cleaning lady. Basically, she can kiss my ass.
OMG, I just realized half the problem -- she's constantly walking through my spare bedroom, because that's how she walks through her apartment, but I use it for storage and it is a shithole in there. Oyyyyy.
It's hard, but I've mostly made my peace with it. Mainly I so acutely feel for anyone else faced with these decisions with their parents. I was trying to cope with this when I wasn't even out of my 30s. There is no way to know if you are making good decisions.
Steph, I hope that everything plays out in the best possible way for your FiL.
