After my mom passed, the kids and I spent Christmas Eve with my dad and then flew down to Disneyland on Christmas for a few days. It was the break we needed.

Yeah, my problem right now is I'd be on my own. Trying to think of a destination that won't break the bank or be grim by myself.

The First Christmas after a loss is a fine time to totally break up tradition and habit by travel or other means.

After my FiL passed, DW, MiL, and I spent the first Christmas with my family. It seemed to be good for them. Do you have any close friends or family members in striking distance? Sending love.

For so many reasons the holidays are hard for me. Some years are better than others, and Pix and I have worked very hard to create new traditions for ourselves which really helps, but I still get regularly clobbered by melancholy this time of year. It just comes out of nowhere and I'll have a really rough day or patch of days.

The First Christmas after a loss is a fine time to totally break up tradition and habit by travel or other means.

After my Mom's closest sister passed, I took her to Vegas for Thanksgiving so we wouldn't be stuck at home, not going to Aunt Sharon's. But that was mostly for her. It's hard to figure out what to do when so much of my planning has been around her for so long.

Do you have any friends or family members in striking distance?

Lots of friends, but all with kids and/or extended families of their own. I have a cousin (divorced, with adult kids) in Orange County (where I went Thanksgiving), who I assumed I would probably be doing something with if nothing else came up. But she hasn't actually invited me yet. And when I mentioned trying to figure out Xmas in a message the other day, she just said something about she doesn't know what's up with xmas, and she can't believe how soon it is. But still no actual invitation to make plans. I'm learning that this cousin is all talk a lot of the time, she'll say we should do such-and-such, but when I try to make an actual plan she's wishy-washy or too busy. Which is why I'm looking at solo plans, so I'm not dependent on her (or my local, but non-communicative brother).

Matt, thank you for helping that sweet muffin of cat.

Having spent 8 Christmases living alone and far away from family when I lived in Arizona, I learned that I enjoyed the peace of just me and the cats plus a few phone calls to loved ones.

but I still get regularly clobbered by melancholy this time of year. It just comes out of nowhere and I'll have a really rough day or patch of days.

Whoo, yeah, right there with you.

Glad those cats have you looking out for them, Matt.

It looks like I'm not getting out of the office anytime soon tonight. No swim. I kinda knew this would happen, though, so I was mentally girded.

I'm usually in a foulish mood most of December. Mostly the weather and timecrunch and stuff. I'm not a holiday person.

I'm sure the annual work timecrunch doesn't help my mood, either. I don't know why we always have a big release in late January.

Good work, Matt. And not just because kitty looks like our Coco.

Having spent 8 Christmases living alone and far away from family when I lived in Arizona, I learned that I enjoyed the peace of just me and the cats plus a few phone calls to loved ones.

My current irony - when I suggest this, it's a warning sign of depression or something. But the same people who object to my chilling out at home also have yet to issue alternate invites.

I'm sure the annual work timecrunch doesn't help my mood, either. I don't know why we always have a big release in late January.

Yeah, the number of things scheduled "by the end of the year" is irksome, especially when my boss is out all next week, so I have to cover plus do my own stuff and everyone else has waited to the last minute to submit, of course.