For a week or so after the finale, I watched that scene every night before going to bed. I just needed to see that love and openness and tenderness again and again.
I'm one of those weirdos who isn't especially interested in slash or the visuals of hot anyone-on-anyone action, but oh how I love a couple with a long slow emotionally-fraught resonant yearning backstory and a sweet first kiss, and this was all of that and then some.
Oh my god, was it ever. And yet it's so bittersweet too, seeing Stede so hesitant and uncertain over the plan to run away to China, especially when Ed can't see his hesitation and is all full speed ahead. And knowing what happens after... it's really almost too much for my poor heart to take.
In other news, I just watched this Ted Lasso vid by Nestra, and now I'm going to have to rewatch it. [link]
Oh, wow, that’s great. Thanks!
That was lovely! And now I'm all anxious about the next season of Ted Lasso.
Also, I don't know to whom I need to submit this request, but I would like to request an OFMD vid to "I'm The Man Who Murdered Love." Who's in charge of that?
The Nimona movie, canned by Disney, has been picked up by Netflix: [link]
I'm very certain I'll never sit down and actually write it, but in my head I'm noodling around with a story, or really just a vague idea, of a dark-haired boy named Ned and a blond-haired boy named Stede, both of whom have clearly disappointed their fathers in ways they don't understand and can't fix and who are off at boarding schools continents and centuries apart under circumstances they can't help feeling are a punishment for being so disappointing. Both lonely, both mostly solitary, both guarded and bleak, and every now and then each boy has vivid dreams in which he's wandering the grounds of a school that's like but unlike his own, quietly talking with a similarly bewildered boy who looks a little like a blonder/dark-haired echo of himself.
The other boy in Ned's dreams seems even flinchier than him, but he and Digby take to each other instantly and Ned's always happy to see him because it means Digby will get all the skritches and belly rubs and butt-pats he deserves, even if it's only in a dream.
Maybe at some point Ned tells the other boy his secret, because it's only a dream and you can tell anyone your secrets in a dream. Besides, he can tell that even if it weren't a dream and this other boy were real, he'd be the kind of friend you could trust with a secret. If he were real, Ned might even tell him out loud, wide awake. Even imagining the possibility of someone he could tell, for real, pinches something up in his chest. Ned's always a little sad when he wakes up and it all dissolves, but also comforted. Every now and then, even for just a snippet of one night every few months, he gets a respite, and that's nice.
The other boy in Stede's dreams seems even dreamier and vaguer than him, but he's very easy to talk to (or just wander the school grounds looking at all the green growing things with, though every fall he's very careful about where he steps and he never seems to want to pick up the fallen leaves, which surprises Stede because he himself has never seen such vivid reds and golds and he just wants to flop down and roll around in the piles). It's a relief, how he never seems to expect Stede to be any particular way and then hurt him for not being it. He also has the best dog Stede's ever met; Stede is always happy to see Digby again (especially in the fall, when they both roll around in the piles of leaves while the other boy stands at many arms' lengths and watches), and he's always a little sad when he wakes up and there's no Digby.
Maybe at some point in one of the recurring dreams the other boy tells him a completely impossible secret about the terrible things he did without meaning to and the impossible gift he doesn't want and doesn't know what to do with, but it's only a dream and in a dream everything seems reasonable and normal. And it's a fine thing to have a friend who trusts you with such a private secret. Stede doesn't tell the other boy any secrets; if he has any of his own, he has yet to discover them. But he does like knowing that if he
did
have one that he knew of, he could tell this other boy. He's fair certain that even if it weren't a dream and this other boy were real, he'd be both trusting and trusty. Stede is always a little sad when he wakes up and the other boy dissolves into the harsh bright world of real flesh-and-blood classmates all determined to be the absolute worst and out-worst each other every day--but he's also just a little comforted. Every now and then, even for just a snippet of one night every few months, he gets a respite.
The dreams happen less and less as they get older and marginally better at finding comfort in mostly-invisibility (Ned) and grimly sticking to the script (Stede). I don't know if they remember the dreams at all once they're both free from their schools and (semi) functional adults out in the world. I'm quite certain Digby remembers, though.
Anyhow, I wish someone else would write it, because I'm not gonna.
Anyhow, I wish someone else would write it, because I'm not gonna.
Uh-huh. That's what we all said at first.
