Nah, I was just gearing up for my own reflection...

2013 was really, truly, a crappy year for me. And yet? I still know how lucky I am, especially in my family. The year started mourning the death of my cat, and then there was an enormous work clusterfuck in January. I think the spring was OK, but who knows. (Edit: Oh yeah! I went to Puerto Rico with my parents in the spring. That was very nice!)

My grandmother was in and out of the hospital, mostly with heart problems, in June and July, and she died in August from a totally different issue. That kicked off months of clearing out (by me and others) and renovating (by others) her apartment, in preparation for my moving into it last month. So far, the move has been great. It's nice to be close to my parents, and great to be in a huge apartment I can afford! I'm mostly settled in, but there is still a lot of my grandmother's stuff to clear out. Luckily, I have a spare bedroom now that it can all go in. At some point, I will be ready for overnight guests, though! The aftermath of my grandmother's death has really shown how close and wonderful my family is. The only fight has been over my uncle refusing to accept his (small) inheritance! We were definitely all missing my grandmother at Thanksgiving and Christmas, but it was still great to be together.

Meanwhile, my father went missing overnight on July 1, which was obviously traumatic. His Alzheimer's is obviously worse and worse, and he's had a couple of seizures this fall, which were scary and certainly didn't help anything. Thank goodness he's still mostly as sunny and kind as ever. We'll see what the future holds there. The upside has been seeing how many great friends my parents have, and how strong their community is. I'm grateful for all of the support they have from other people.

Edit: I should also give a shout-out to my own friends, here and elsewhere, who have been enormous support to me. I needed the girls' trip to Vegas in August like never before, and had a great 40th birthday party last weekend.

And if that weren't enough, I got a new job this month! Sort of by accident -- I had been keeping my eyes open, and had interviewed for a couple of jobs earlier in the year, but had certainly put all that on hold while the move and etc. were happening. But I got a call from a great organization about what sounded like a great position, so I went for it, and got the job. So we'll see about that as well!

At the beginning of 2013, I would not have predicted this is where I would end up, but I feel pretty positive about my immediate future. But that could just be because I almost always manage to feel positive about every damn thing! Better than the alternative, I guess.

Happy new year, y'all! Even if your 2013 was great, I hope 2014 is even better.

Jesse, I'm not goint to copy-and-paste from what I wrote to Steph above, but you were very much in my thoughts this year, especially with all that happened in your family.

Also, in my so-much-skimming-it's-actually-skipping, I didn't know about the new job, so congratulations! I hope the new place will be at least as good to you as I'm sure you'll be for them.

that could just be because I almost always manage to feel positive about every damn thing! Better than the alternative, I guess.

I don't care how sappy it is - I think you're great. And not just because of JZ' wonderful description of your Secret Santa talents, too.

Happy new year, y'all! Even if your 2013 was great, I hope 2014 is even better.

Worth repeating.

so now you were generous enough to give me (oh, everything is so meMeME) a chance to tell you how happy I am in your joys, and how you were very much in my thoughts regarding the stressful and less-than-joyous parts of your year.

Oh, Nilly, thank you!!!

Also, I love the way you write - so clearly, so full of thought, and yet with such elegant turns of phrases.

And thank you for saying that, too!

Thanks, Nilly! You are great.

Nilly!!!!!

And thank you for saying that, too

I still remember something you wrote (and read aloud at some - oh, my sieve, I don't even remember what, where and why), about how writing was always a part of you, or rather, how you felt you were always part of writing. It not only had a beautiful ring to it, but also showed, in such few words, what you thought and felt regarding the whole subject. It's been years since I saw that sentence from you (goodness, maybe even a decade), but I liked it so much, it stayed with me ever since.

Scrappy!!!

Um, I don't need content. Just your exclamation points. I think you're great, too.

(I'm in front of the computer because I'm writing an exam for a class I'm teaching for the first time. Actually, I should be sleeping, but posting is so much more fun!)

This has been...an interesting year? I don't think I'm a big fan of interesting years.

Good: Moved back to Texas. We were very tired of the town we were living in, which was never a good match for us. The process of moving is always a pain (at least for me, and if anyone enjoys it, let me know so I can hire you next time), but we have a great house and the promise of 60-degree weather by the weekend.

Bad: Still haven't sold the other house.

Good: I was able to work at my old job for a few months long distance, and I continue to do hourly work for them.

Bad: Still no new job.

Good: Much closer to my family.

Bad: Which became pretty important when my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer right about the time we moved. I was down there for a week.

Good: She did really well with the surgery and followup.

Bad: But despite everyone's predictions, they found another carcinoma last week when they finished the round of six-month tests. At the advice of doctors, she's opting for a double mastectomy and reconstructive surgery. It should really truly be dealt with at that point, but it's pretty stressful right now.

Good: Spent a week in Austria and Germany.

Bad: Which overlapped with my mother's hospital stay in Austria, when she had a bad kidney infection. This has really not been her year.

In summary, I feel like all of the above have conspired to make me pretty flaky this year. I got through the important stuff, but lots of other stuff was deprioritized to the point that I couldn't give a shit about it. I watched a lot of TV. I ate too much food, but since May, a lot of it has been Mexican or sushi or Vietnamese or Thai, most of which I couldn't get at the old place. I worked out not enough and slept too much. But I made it through.

As always, I'm grateful for you guys and all of my online friends.

Oh, Dana - it's an opportunity to tell you, too, how much you (and your mother) have been in my thoughts (And - I hope it's OK - in my daily prayers).

I hope the next year will not enable you to write such a symmetrical Good-Bad column, because the good will so much outweigh the bad.

Oh, and you're great, too.

It's possible I've missed posting with you guys too much, or something sapped my keyboard, or it's the constant lack of sleep and leaking of IQ points. I'm, um, sorry? Not sure.

Like Dana and Jesse, I had a year that was, frankly, too interesting.

Moving my parents into assisted living in November of 2012 led to a couple of months of horribleness with my mother's mental health issues, compounded by job uncertainty. I got notice in March (on Mom's birthday, in fact) that I was going to be laid off, and within a few weeks Mom took a turn for the worse. The job ended in May and Mom died a week later. I worked two months during the summer, but haven't found anything since.

So that all sucked.

On the more positive side, my oldest brother's restaurant business is going gangbusters (he plans to open two more this year!), my nieces and nephews are all doing wonderfully, and the rest of the family is in good health. Dad seems to be settling into a routine and has made some friends (although we have not yet convinced him to stop driving).

I do hope 2014 has more of the pleasant kind of excitement and less of the awful stressful kind.

And I'm immensely grateful to the Buffistas, who have been so kind and supportive through all of this: you've really been awesome, and {{I hug you all}}.

This year has been mixed. Very, very mixed.

Bad: The stress levels at my tech writing job kept soaring, the manager who took over our team turned into Dolores Umbridge, and she tried to railroad me into a 30 day performance improvement plan that I didn't deserve.

Good: I never thought I'd be happy to be unemployed, but hey! I don't work for a horrible person anymore, I'm not hiding under my desk and taking Xanax every afternoon, and I'm getting some of my long-delayed projects underway!

Good: We went to the UK! Pete visited his family for the first time in 13 years!

Bad: Angst, family issues, and trying to help his mom sort through a lot of things that had built up in the house.

Good: We saw UK peeps (WE SAW FAY!), and I had a religious experience at the David Bowie Exhibit at the V&A.

Good: I went to California to visit Cass, go see a concert, and generally decompress after the horrible ex-job.

Good: I finished the first draft of my fiction project, and it is in my agent's hands.

And finally, Weird: Casting agents and people with notions of reality TV shows keep contacting me. Who knows where that will go?