In regard to scaring listeners:
Nothing Rhymes With “Episiotomy”
Janie and I went to Marcia’s shower
expecting some pre-baby fun.
We arrived at her house at the agreed upon hour
and immediately wanted to run.
Marcia’s round belly was surrounded by girls who
regaled her with tales of their labor,
while Marcia grew paler and tried to grab onto
her wits, a life raft, or a saber.
“I pooped on the table,” said plump, old Aunt Pat,
(She made it sound like a boast).
Said Tiffany-Sue: “Oh, everyone does that.”
Marcia turned white as a ghost.
“For shame, now girls,” said reserved cousin Flo,
“Who cares ’bout your old lady bits?
Babies do much more damage as they grow.
Good heavens, just look at my tits!”
Within a half-hour I needed a shower
and Marcia and Janie looked faint.
“Why, that’s nothing” said gran, who fluttered her fan,
“You should see what they did to my taint!”
Of blood and of bile they prattled on blindly,
(By now Marcia was starting to heave.)
They showed c-section scars (a little unkindly).
It was clear that we needed to leave.
The talk of the girls
caused great twisting of pearls
and left us all thinking of options.
Janie’s decided to stay on the pill,
And I’m looking into adoption.
by Jenny Lawson
edited to add line breaks
I think I'll remember the bit about "I have been seeing a doctor about my issues for several years, I prefer to have these discussions with him." Maybe some hints about HIPAA would be useful.
Also, hot flashes suck.
The 3 on the digital fingerpad for our oven won't work -- you have to press BAKE and then manually program the time, or hit AutoSet to get it to 350. There are no up and down arrows to adjust temperature.
The banana bread I want to make requires 375, for 40-50 min. Would it be better to do it on 400 for a shorter time, or 350 (because I'm pretty sure the AutoSet will work) for shorter?
Suggestions?
Probably preheated to 350.
And bake a little longer? (I accidentally put shorter above.)
can someone send Jesse some eye candy to put up at eyecandy.
If you go 'lower for longer' you're less likely to overbake -- more margin for error.
I'll be scientific-like and say that if 375F for 40 minutes is the goal, you can make an equation and predict that you're shooting for 15,000 thingies of cooking thingery. So dividing 15,000 by 350F gives you 42.86 minutes.
I know that the range of cooking temps does different things to different substances -- for instance, it breaks down proteins in meat, swells up yeast gas and like that. However, a 25 degree difference here should just be a matter of time.
can someone send Jesse some eye candy to put up at eyecandy.
Heh. I can probably find some myself.
I am just bored with the pretty I am seeing on tumblr. need more.
msbelle, have you checked out Sue's guys-with-eyeliner tumblr?
I'll be scientific-like and say that if 375F for 40 minutes is the goal, you can make an equation and predict that you're shooting for 15,000 thingies of cooking thingery.
Scientific Theo is a thingery of beauty.
