Actual Marmaduke: [link]

Nobody tells that dog what to do.

That's my kind of dog.

Ugh, Sox. I'm sorry that relative dwells on things that happened so many months ago and then unleashes the perceived slights on you. If she unleashes on HPF, then you have a much larger problem. On the other side of the family, HDE and HGE weren't even told about my Dad's surgery... those brothers!

Since my DH follows kosher rules but also is a very picky eater we have looked into the question of what he tells the people with whom he's interviewing with - the accepted practice seems to be that you may tell your interviewer ahead of time about being kosher/vegetarian/vegan, etc., but you may not tell them that you just don't like seafood. So he can refuse shrimp, but he has to suck it up if they give him salmon. Which is basically the same rules as a dinner party.

HDE and HGE weren't even told about my Dad's surgery... those brothers

I'ma email you what happened on my side of the family. Basically, that relative took the opportunity of your dad's surgery to complain about me. That was awesome.

I'm glad your dad's doing better.

Flea. Ugh. I admire you for trying the deflection technique. Separately, the peeing boggles me.

Kat, thanks. I hope so too. I'm doing everything I can here to make sure she knows and still has a great relationship with that relative.

the accepted practice seems to be that you may tell your interviewer ahead of time about being kosher/vegetarian/vegan, etc., but you may not tell them that you just don't like seafood. So he can refuse shrimp, but he has to suck it up if they give him salmon. Which is basically the same rules as a dinner party.

My mother had a friend over for dinner recently, and said afterward that it would be the last time, because she is too picky! I think half the problem was that she was too honest -- she told her all the things she doesn't like and/or prefers not to eat. If she had just said she "can't" eat them, my mother would have felt sorry for her, instead of being annoyed! NB: I think this is a bad strategy at a restaurant, but more OK with friends.

My DH's grandmother, who used to cook for him growing up, made three separate dinners every night that catered to the various family members likes/dislikes. It did not make him an easy guest, let me tell you.

But since Stockholm was so likely to include seafood, and shrimp is all over the place, we just had this issue come up. As much as he would like to tell his hosts he doesn't like fish, it's rude to do so. (Miss Manners adds the caveat that you can refuse food you don't like if it will make you puke.)

Miss Manners made a famous exception for lobster, in the face of a young relative finally admitting that he can't eat things that look like jillifonts, and she called the exception good because she really loves lobster salad and was more than happy not to waste expensive food and use the leftovers later. Though that was at a private function.

As much as he would like to tell his hosts he doesn't like fish, it's rude to do so.

Yes indeed. And what if someone took your four approved ingredients and STILL made something you didn't like? You just suck it up.

Miss Manners made a famous exception for lobster, in the face of a young relative finally admitting that he can't eat things that look like jillifonts, and she called the exception good because she really loves lobster salad and was more than happy not to waste expensive food and use the leftovers later.

Ah yes -- as a child, I only got one chance to refuse lobster salad. From then on, I got tuna. (I'm still not big on lobster, but am willing to eat it. But still, why bother?)

Bob Costas is finally taking a sick day for his eyes: [link]

(Can you tell I don't feel like working? Heh.)