::Thinking fond Epic thoughts.

Steph, you're Dad is not the only one who is obsessing about matching his future son in law in a wedding.

Mom has neighbors getting married and her neighbor was venting about her Dad - who called her and wanted to know what cut and color suit her fiancee was wearing at the wedding. And what color/type of tie. So he could match. Her bridesmaids aren't matching, the groomsmen aren't matching. It's a super casual DIY wedding. But her father keeps asking - why aren't you doing X or Y or Z, or what will you do if X happens.

Then the bride called her Mom to vent. Who called her Dad to tell him to chill out and lay off. Which upset her Dad so he called the bride to complain that she vented to her Mom and it's none of her (the Mom's business). To which the Bride replied, but it's my business. It's a super casual wedding , there will probably be people in jeans.

I think there's something about weddings that causes at least one person in the family or wedding party to just freak out.

::Thinking fond Epic thoughts.

Aww, thanks, Scrappy!

Not really here. Actually releasing documents, completing audits, and updating manuals. Like A Boss.

Steph, you're Dad is not the only one who is obsessing about matching his future son in law in a wedding.

I'm trying to be chill about it. It could be so much worse. I know Dad just wants to feel included, wants people to know he's Not Just A Guest, wants to feel honored, etc. I get that. t edit Plus he might have been whacked out on percocet when he decided he wants to be twinsies with my future husband (CREEPY), and has already totally forgotten it. (OTOH, I know my brother -- who is officiating -- bought a black suit, and if Dad shows up and he thinks Jeff and Tim "match" but he doesn't, he'll be pissed. So maybe I should just encourage him to drop $400+ on a suit he'll only wear once. I don't even know.)

It's still weird that he's the parentzilla, rather than my mom (other than some incredibly insulting things she posted on FB after my shower, but really, for a narcissist who can't stand not being the center of attention, she's been behaving incredibly well).

I'm always happy to see you here, Epic!

I've been feeling kind of absent myself lately. The thing I try to remember is that we will always be Buffistas and people will always care about us here, even if we have to take a break from time to time.

Askye, yikes. And Tep, I hope things are getting better with your dad or that you've found more spoons to help you deal with the craxy.

X-post: I'm sorry to hear your mom posted nasty comments.

And Tep, I hope things are getting better with your dad or that you've found more spoons to help you deal with the craxy.

I'm at the point of not being able to deal with anything. I don't want to go have Father's Day lunch with him tomorrow because I'm still strung out and angry about him disregarding my knowledge when he was in the hospital, and angry because I know that he won't follow up with a gastroenterologist to find out why he CAN'T GODDAMN SWALLOW -- I mean, am *I* the insane one here? Would most people not give a crap if they physically could not swallow food or liquid? Is my desire to actually swallow one of those highfaluting ideas like Respiration Is Awesome, or Heartbeats: Fuck Yeah! ?

Anyway. Tim is coming to lunch with us tomorrow, so maybe he can just talk to Dad about suits.

Epic, it's great to see you. Good luck with the work craziness.

X-post: I'm sorry to hear your mom posted nasty comments.

Heh. I'm mostly amused but slightly mortified that she posted them where Tim's family could read them. (Actually, no -- addressed one of them TO Tim's SiL.) One comment was on a post about the bridal shower, and mom addressed it to SiL, saying "Thank you for taking Stephanie under your wing, even though she's a real pain!"

Classy, lady. Classy.

Another one was a comment on a picture my aunt posted of the shower, saying "I don't know why Tim's family puts up with her!" (Uh, my mom posted that, not my aunt. My aunt just posted the picture.)

I didn't even realize until I was in my 30s that healthy families don't actually treat each other that way. But I get it. I get her. She hates not being the center of attention, and while she more or less behaved perfectly well at the shower (other than taking literally 135 candid photos, 4 of which are somewhat flattering), sooner or later her need to be the center of attention was going to come out.

And I don't actually even think she deliberately does it -- she doesn't think "I'm going to insult my daughter in public so that it takes away from her enjoyment of her only bridal shower!" I think she just thinks she's teasing or being funny or something, but...really? Insult me TO Tim's family?

Stay classy, lady. Stay classy.

Oh Steph, I am so impressed that you can take the high road with her acting like that. I'd be so tempted to get angry at her. But your reaction is so much healthier.

I think my replies to her in the FB threads were as follows:

Mom: "blah blah she is a real pain..."
Me: "Actually, I am a bottomless fountain of PURE DELIGHT."

Mom: "I don't know why Tim's family puts up with her!"
Me: "They put up with me because I am a delight and they love me."