I think I got most of what I need at Wegman's. I should be cleaning and organizing now, but I'm watching Teen Wolf instead.

My life is good. I know this. But it is not the life I expected to lead.

Even a good life, it's not the life you once planned or hoped to have and you deserve to mourn that fact.

Which was kind of cool and kind of ew that's my mom! at the same time. It was such a non thing for him to jump to that relationship conclusion based on how we talked to each other.

Barring how alike we look, I think it's cool when people think Mom and I are lesbian wives and not Mom and daughter. Not that going too far into that rabbit hole isn't all kinds of eww, but just that the possibility exists to more people in the world now that people partner same sex and that's okay is good.

I get to go visit my uncle and uncle-in-law tomorrow and my other uncle (sans my favorite uncle-in-law) is visiting from Oregon. Really glad to get to see them. Sadly, it'll be a short visit.

Saturday night we are doing a birthday dinner for me and celebrating Father's Day. As bad as I thought things were last year, I never expected it would be the last year I had my Dad.

Oh Cass, many hugs to you. I want to say happy birthday, but I realize that it will be a bittersweet one. Over time, the holidays get easier.

We're doing that side of family dinner on Saturday and, I think, hanging out on part of Sunday. But my actual birthday is Monday and I'll spend that with Mom with whom I plan to do yoga in the morning and have no idea what to do later, maybe lunch and errands.

It's going to be a really bittersweet but hopefully I am thinking of Saturday as Dad's night and us celebrating Father's Day. And Monday can be my birthday. I need the closure of the dinner, I think, but I hope it does get easier as well.

And I am kinda wishing it weren't the year I turned 42. This birthday is supposed to be fun and full of geekery.

And I am kinda wishing it weren't the year I turned 42. This birthday is supposed to be fun and full of geekery.

Oh wow, and such a birthday! I was planning a big party for my 42nd birthday and then my MiL got her diagnosis that month and there went my plans. sigh. I guess I can aim for my 50th? One of these years I'll have a birthday party.

Oh and I should say that the year can pack in enough fun and geekery to totally make up for it.

Hmm. I turn 42 in 10 days, and...I don't want anything else crappy to happen between now and then.

I hope 42 is a good year for you, Cass and Teppy. I'm sure it was a good year for other people. But I gotta say, mine was a pretty horrible year.

Cass, buy yourself a towel. You deserve a really, really nice one. Bathsheet. Fluffy.

(My favorite towel is the one I got for my friend's 42nd birthday, which was unfortunately a year and a half after he died. But I got him a really nice one. I figured he'd have appreciated it, as I've never met a bigger Douglas Adams fan than he was, and that he would never begrudge me his spirit towel.)

Which reminds me, I STILL need to get myself a second memorial towel for someone who died at almost 42.

Towels have become very meaningful to me.