I have been to both dry and vegetarian weddings (and a dry vegetarian wedding) and while I VERY MUCH appreciate the social lubricant that an open bar provides obviously I would never presume that my preferences should be taken into account or even verbalized to the happy couple and their immediate family.

Oh, HELL yes. I personally would strongly prefer there be booze at a wedding, and I might express disappointment (quietly) to Tim if there isn't, but I don't feel like I have the right to booze, and I sure would never say so to the couple.

Sneak in a flask and some jerky, people. Or maybe just STFU.

We didn't have a full bar, but we had a crapload of many types of beers (from microbrews to Bud Light), ciders, white wine, red wine, and apparently endless champagne. If we had had the budget for a full bar (meaning spirits) we would have done it, but our guest list generally drinks beer and wine anyway. (And if we had had whiskey, I probably would have started doing shots, and that ends up with me flashing people, which is kind of tacky when you're the bride. So it worked out for the best.)

I still have 1 bottle of wedding champagne left, which we're taking to a NYE shindig. (I'd save it for the 1-year anniversary, but since Tim doesn't drink, it would be just me swigging it out of the bottle, and that's just sad.)

Just you swigging it out of the bottle isn't nearly as sad when you're married to someone you love.

I think 14,000 is around what it costs to rent a mansion in Newport for a wedding (maybe a little more). That doesn't include the linens, food, paying the servers, or anything else, just the space.

I remember years ago there was this huge debate running in one of the advice columns - a couple who were vegetarian announced that they wouldn't be serving meat at the wedding dinner. A number of their invited guests announced that if there wasn't any meat - how COULD THEY?!?!?! - they wouldn't be attending. My reaction was "huh?"

I've seen letters like that in numerous advice columns. Once, someone asked if they really needed to bring a gift, since they weren't getting a "real meal." I felt like responding, "Do you know how many weddings I've been to where I brought a gift and all I could eat was a baked potato?" (Though my favorite was at my cousins' b'nai mitzvah, where the waiter first tried to tell me that fish was vegan, then, when I finally convinced him that the plate of fish in front of me was not vegan, he removed it, replaced it with an identical plate of fish, and said, "There. Vegan.")

Bit of a leap from "kosher dairy" to "vegetarian" much less "vegan".

Though is IS handy if you're pescetarian.

Once, someone asked if they really needed to bring a gift, since they weren't getting a "real meal."

A gift isn't the price of admission, or payment for a meal. Yeesh. A gift isn't even required (although it's rude as hell to not even acknowledge the nuptials via a card).

Things I cannot say elsewhere: Dear 23 year old guy who's FB profile photo looks like a very stoned 13 year old: Sending me a message of "I'd like to fuck you" with a winky emoticon is not going to get a reply. However, Pete is considering posting on your FB page.

Ah, internets.

Anyway, back on topic: people who complain about weddings they're attending are a mystery to me. You're there because the couple wants you to celebrate with them! It's not about food, alcohol, or gifts.