ND, I have the same reaction to filling out paperwork on my job. I've done it for fourteen years and I still hate it. I always just stare at it and feel completely lost. So, yeah...it's not just you.

I'm planning to take some classes. I've even thought about going to night school for an MBA. I'm working off some of the SCORE templates for the paperwork currently. The immediate issues is that I am meeting with the bank vice president tomorrow after lunch and have to look like I know what I'm doing.

I think the most frustrating thing is that I run a successful business and I clearly have good instincts for how to run a business, I just have zero training in it so things that I'm sure are totally reasonable and normal documents for a business end up being things that send me into a tail spin.

The fact that you are working from SCORE templates already suggests to me that you will do great with the bank VP. I am sure she routinely meets with people who are not already running a successful business and have terrible instincts. I teach grantwriting and about nonprofits, and I can tell right away which people have the basics but just lack formal training, and which people really have no clue. (Hint: the people with no clue tend to be more confident - they don't know enough to know they have no clue.)

Totally and completely what flea said!

It won't assuage your fear in the short run, ND, but I'm with flea that the banker will recognize a good prospect pretty much whatever you do.

My sense is that, anyone in that position is going to have worked with a lot of people and seen the best and the worst enough to know that you being a genius sound designer and competent person does not have to mean that you are great with technical paperwork.

If there are any issues with what you produce, the bank will surely advise you on what needs improvement. Seeing that you've grown during one of the worst economies in recent history will ensure their interest in providing the support you need.

Nilly, I didn't get an email from you. Did you get my email?

I have wee bit of good news: per phone call from GI specialist my follow up MRI shows nothing worrisome on the liver mass. There were even medical words to describe it this time: hepatic hematoma. (last time it was "well, we can't really tell what it is just yet so let's not call it a "tumor" or "cysts" but stick with "mass") It hasn't gotten any bigger, and I still haven't been able to see actual images yet, but per the written description it has changed in shape slightly (before it was perfectly spherical, 6cm, now three measurements are all different. It averages out to pretty much the same. I really want to see the images, and have appt w/ PCP on thurs so hopefully she'll have access to those.

And for the unrelated lower pain (which is still undiagnosed but being treated as a musculo-skeletal entrapment of the femoral artery) as of yesterday I'm now going to a different PT who works very differently and more aggressively. As a result everything currently hurts +3 with no medication (but OTC ibuprofen is working magic) so i'm considering that to be progress. Also, epsom salt baths are still magic and I have a hard copy of Code Name Verity to re-read in preparation for Rose Under Fire so that's my plans for the rest of the evening.

That is excellent fucking news, erin!

It's good to get a diagnosis. Hope this leads to good health and no-pain in a hurry.

And ND, I'm amazed at how much shit you have together. Being able to blend both the creative aspects of your job with the business shenanigans is totally beyond my realm of comprehension.

Slightly related, I went to see a show tonight called "Twist your Dickens" which was, of course, based on ACC. Guess who the scenic designer was? And guess how much the scenery looked like SCR's version? It was eerie. I was like "Scrooge's desk is at the wrong angle and Cratchit''s desk is too low.....Scrooge's bed curtains were non functional and there was no bell pull but his fireplace was exactly the same....false proscenium very similar with an added caricature sketch of Dickens. I had fun looking for scenic similarities. The show was also very entertaining for everyone else as well. I was envious of their show curtain: a nice perspective London street view with a water-color effect.

He also designed a production of Twist your Dickens here in Los Angeles at the Kirk Douglas theater. I haven't had a chance to see it, but I know most of the folks who worked on the LA production.

Okay, I'm heading to bed. Pix was a saint and helped me get a lot of the financial data out of Quicken Essentials which is where she handles all the finances. Hopefully it paints a good picture for the bank tomorrow and will get us to phase 2 of line of credit application.

I'm glad you got good medical news and that your pain is manageable, erin!

Much bank~ma, ND.