Just got back from eye surgery at Clarus. Clarus also does audiology. And they figured that as long as they had a captive audience in the waiting room for eye surgery, that they would try to sell hearing aids. So here was the audiologist's hard sell pitch. I may have spoiled it a bit by laughing about halfway through it. See if you get a giggle from it.

1) 50% of people over 53 need hearing aids. Also if you are having serious eye problems there is a good chance that you have hearing problems as well, no matter what your age. So you, yes you probably need a hearing aid.

2) Now it is true that hearing aids are expensive. But studies have shown that people who need hearing aids and don't get them suffer from depression, low self-esteem, social isolation and ... In short, if you need a hearing aid, life is not worth living without one.

3) What if you already have a hearing aid? Well, there has been a revolution in hearing aid manufacturing. So if your hearing aid is more than two years old, it is garbage compared to what is standard today. Note that at this point the audiologist has defined her market as all of the following A) Anyone 53 or over B) anyone with serious eye problems C) anyone already wearing a hearing aid that is over two years old.

4) But, you may be thinking, the hearing aids this place sell are expensive. Maybe I should get a new hearing aid, but shop elsewhere before buying one here. It turns out that the new revolutionary hearing aids require advanced programming skills that are not included in standard audiologist education. But this audiologist, standing right in front of people in a waiting room waiting for eye surgery, has advanced professional training in programming the new generation of hearing aids. You plain old audiologist down the road can't come close to her mad digital hearing aid adjustment skills. So not only had you better get a new hearing aid if you want your life not to be miserable, you need to get it from this audiologist, or it will never be adjusted right.

So, I have no idea what her real skills are as an audiologist, but she definitely has what it takes to sell used cars.

So, I have no idea what her real skills are as an audiologist, but she definitely has what it takes to sell used cars.

And shove 'em in your ear, apparently. I'M SORRY, DID YOU HEAR THAT? SHOULD I SPEAK UP?

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I had a good first date today. Guy is smart, geeky, funny, and has a lot of different interests/talents. He's an artist/web designer, loves cars and fixes his own, likes to cook. He listens to iTunes U lectures and does Khan Academy stuff for fun. Anyway, we'll see what happens but I'm amused by myself because I don't even give a crap about the flirting/first kiss/first makeout stuff at all, I just want to skip straight to established relationship/snuggling on the couch. Like, right now. Tonight. Come on over. Like, I'm actively pondering inviting him over.

And suddenly I'm wondering... why shouldn't I? Hmm. Right, because I have stuff to do so I can relax tomorrow.

Hmm.

I ended up inviting him over, but he's going to crash because he didn't have the afternoon nap I did. Should have invited him when I first thought about it!

YAY good first date! Has he been McWarinigle approved or are you feeling confident?

t grin

Definitely Yay! for a good first date!

Nora, maybe? Can't remember. I'll send y'all his profile today.

No worries, doll. I was just teasing!

I can't remember who has talked about the soothing properties of coloring in a coloring book (and/or mandalas, which are more sophisticated than an Avengers coloring book). But I was at Target the other day and bought an Avengers coloring book and a box of crayons, and it is awesome.

Plus, the way a box of new crayons smells is FANTASTIC. Oh my god.