The comments on that are hysterical, especially all the people who scrolled up to look at #3 again.

I thought #7 wasn't really a cake, but an art installation. Their stuff is brilliant, savage, and tasty-looking.

The rest? Look very cakey and in significantly less good manners.

Although if I went to an event that had one I might feel differently.

Having a friend's face to directly associate with the vulva in question would really change things, and not for the better unless I had extremely warm fuzzies about her warm fuzzy.

(And the funniest part is that this person, earlier in the summer, was invited to a mutual friend's wedding that Tim and I weren't invited to, and she posted pictures, and my reaction was "Wedding pictures YAAAAAAAY!!!" I totally missed the part where I was supposed to be hurt that someone else's wedding wasn't all about me.)

See, now, to me this seems like a perfectly reasonable response.

But I'm an asshole sometimes.

Steph, that disgruntled lady was actually on the list of people you'd invite if you had room? I imagine for any future festivities, she won't be on the list at all. What a pill.

Word. If you'd like to be an even BIGGER asshole you could tag on, "looks like we made the right call here."

I have a real peeve against "blind items" in social media. You're not Michael Musto so you're an eighth grader. Seriously. More than once I've just embraced my a-hole tendencies and flat-out lectured people on this. If there is even the teeeeniest tiiiiiniest possibility that the people you are referring to could see it just stifle yourself. Don't do it. Never do it. Its bullshit. Just don't.

Steph, that disgruntled lady was actually on the list of people you'd invite if you had room? I imagine for any future festivities, she won't be on the list at all. What a pill.

You should have an X-mas or Solstice or whatever party and invite everyone but her and send her a note saying space was limited so you couldn't invite everybody but you knew she'd understand.

I have a real peeve against "blind items" in social media. You're not Michael Musto so you're an eighth grader. Seriously. More than once I've just embraced my a-hole tendencies and flat-out lectured people on this. If there is even the teeeeniest tiiiiiniest possibility that the people you are referring to could see it just stifle yourself. Don't do it. Never do it. Its bullshit. Just don't.

Passive aggressive bullshit in general bothers the fuck out of me - social media or not. If you haven't complained to the person directly first, then shut the fuck up. If you are feeling hurt you weren't invited, then email Tep and then perhaps you could have a conversation or have a celebratory gathering for people who couldn't/weren't able to go.

There was someone I knew years ago who celebrated her marriage with something like 10 parties because she and he came from huge families and acquaintances and they couldn't all be invited to the wedding.

You do not know how many times I have nearly shouted "work it out in thread!" To work people and others who would have no idea what the f I'm talking about.

Venting I get. If you say, "Some people need to step the fuck OFF" about, say, your 85 year old in laws who you don't want to name by name but are never going to read facebook its relatively harmless. But its still probably better avoided.

I have one blessedly former friend who is the QUEEN of the passive aggressive tweet. "Sigh... left out AGAIN". Honestly. 43 years old and she tweets that.

Man do I not miss her.

Aw, Steph. I wish I could say, in even remotely less weary and cynical tones...I know so many people like that.

Merciful Cheezus, when will people grow up?

Glam posted an article on facebook a while back...and perhaps here as well...about how losing sometimes will help children avoid growing up to become like this 'friend' of yours. Lord. Perhaps I lost a bit too much as a child, but I'm grateful to not be the sort who thinks every action by another is a slight against me.

Back when I was working harder than I ever have, or ever will, on the Great Peace March, traveling endless miles and throwing myself (sometimes quite literally) on the mercy of strangers to help my community move forward every day, one of the men in leadership felt it necessary to sit me down and tell me that I really need to get information back to camp quicker.

Right. No cell phones. One voicemail box. No computers. No carrier pigeon.

All I could say was, "You know, you are absolutely right. I bleed myself dry every day for you and when I get the info, I park three blocks away and cackle with glee over how I'm screwing up YOUR life."

Wow. I guess I'm still a tiny bit bitter.

There is a place in the world for compassion. I just wish it was a bigger place.

And I'd be happy to proxy sit people down so brides and grooms don't have to deal with teh stupid like that.

Okay. I've got an address for you.

And etiquette about stuff like that is always such a minefield anyway. Like is the person sending an invite all "Man, we love and miss you," or are they trolling for gifts?

Well, TBH, we aren't legally married. We don't actually even LIKE each other. We just wanted gifts SO HARD.

Steph, that disgruntled lady was actually on the list of people you'd invite if you had room? I imagine for any future festivities, she won't be on the list at all. What a pill.

Word. If you'd like to be an even BIGGER asshole you could tag on, "looks like we made the right call here."

Man, I am SO thinking about it.

It would not occur to me to act that way. We were once invited at the last minute to a wedding- because enough people said that they couldn't come. I was thrilled that they thought of us when they had room.

I figure most people have budgets.

I never want one of those cakes