Wash: So, two days in a hospital? That's awful. Don't you just hate doctors? Simon: Hey. Wash: I mean, present company excluded. Jayne: Let's not be excluding people. That'd be rude.

'Ariel'


Spike's Bitches 48: I Say, We Go Out There, and Kick a Little Demon Ass.  

[NAFDA] Spike-centric discussion. Lusty, lewd (only occasionally crude), risqué (and frisqué), bawdy (Oh, lawdy!), flirty ('cuz we're purty), raunchy talk inside. Caveat lector.


billytea - Sep 17, 2013 3:48:21 pm PDT #4816 of 30002
You were a wrong baby who grew up wrong. The wrong kind of wrong. It's better you hear it from a friend.

I have finished my birthday weekend back in Canberra, which was awesome. My sister and her husband hosted a party at their place on the Saturday night. We had cousins and old family friends that I hadn't seen in years. (It was especially good seeing my cousins. Very interesting catching up with them.) Best party I've had in a long while. (Though apparently my older brother made a scene or two.)

Other weekend highlights included taking Ryan to the National Science and Technology Centre. Some of it's still over his head, but there was plenty of Science that he could enjoy. (Such as freezing his shadow on a wall or recording himself singing and then changing the playback speed.)

So that's the good part, but the weekend also represents the culmination of some family drama that's been ramping up since March, and has caused me more than a few sleepless nights these last few months. My birthday is also my dad's birthday, his 70th this year. That's also his mandatory retirement, for which he had a big celebration on the Friday night. Not one of his children were there. Nor did D make an appearance at my party. Long story short, his new wife's dislike of us (and vice versa) has come to a head, when D excluded selected children from his birthday plans on her behalf, in the process breaking an explicit promise to us that he would not do so this time. I've spent the last several months trying to negotiate a compromise; instead, at each step he made things worse, until we reached this state of affairs where none of us were invited to his party, and he refused to come to my party (which originally was not my party but his own proposed get-together), instead leaving the city entirely.

Needless to say, we're all deeply wounded. For me it's the last straw. My younger brothers were done back in April when he first reneged on his promise (it had been made to them specifically). I dropped off a birthday present for him (the boxed set of The Wire - this holiday season, give the gift of Omar), and with that I'm out too.

On the plus side, at least I'm sleeping again.


Laura - Sep 17, 2013 4:09:17 pm PDT #4817 of 30002
Our wings are not tired.

Oh bt, I am so sorry for the excess family drama. It is a good thing that you have the abundance of joy of your immediate family to balance things. Hug them extra tight.


Scrappy - Sep 17, 2013 4:11:10 pm PDT #4818 of 30002
Life moves pretty fast. You don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.

I'm sorry, BT. This kind of drama is so difficult, and you with a peacemaker's heart, it must be extra-hard on you.


javachik - Sep 17, 2013 4:14:24 pm PDT #4819 of 30002
Our wings are not tired.

Wow. That is so difficult and so terrible. I am sorry. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

BUT, HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY! I am glad you had a lovely party with your cousins and Ryan and all.

ETA: I can see that this looks like a cruel joke. I should have separated the two posts. Will edit.


billytea - Sep 17, 2013 4:49:26 pm PDT #4820 of 30002
You were a wrong baby who grew up wrong. The wrong kind of wrong. It's better you hear it from a friend.

ETA: I can see that this looks like a cruel joke. I should have separated the two posts. Will edit.

Pfft. If I put everything in one post, so can you.

I'm sorry, BT. This kind of drama is so difficult, and you with a peacemaker's heart, it must be extra-hard on you.

See, I usually say 'conflict-avoidant', but I like your phrasing better. It did make it difficult trying to turn him around. (There was one week in the middle of it where I got no sleep at all most nights.) I think I'm better off than most of my siblings though. I have a pretty extensive family life of my own. (Plus, frankly, the counselling I went through over the breakup of my first marriage has helped with this situation too.) My youngest brother and sister, who are both pretty sensitive, are particularly hard hit.


smonster - Sep 17, 2013 5:10:05 pm PDT #4821 of 30002
We won’t stop until everyone is gay.

Hi Toddson!

billytea, I'm glad that you and your siblings have drawn some boundaries, and I'm so sorry they were necessary. Happy birthday to you.

I am ragetastic for no discernable (sp?) reason, except possibly because I forgot to take my Zoloft yesterday. I was fine until, of all things, my coworker changing how we do our timesheets made me flip out like a mammal (not in her presence). And then I nearly flipped out like a mammal at my drunk roommate who would. not. shut. up.

RAWR. I am going to bed. There may be Xanax involved.


Cass - Sep 17, 2013 5:57:41 pm PDT #4822 of 30002
Bob's learned to live with tragedy, but he knows that this tragedy is one that won't ever leave him or get better.

Oh bt, I am so sorry for the excess family drama. It is a good thing that you have the abundance of joy of your immediate family to balance things. Hug them extra tight.

Laura said it well.

Definitely a happy belated birthday and I am so glad you have such a happy family with Biyi and Ryan. You deserve so much joy.


le nubian - Sep 17, 2013 5:58:19 pm PDT #4823 of 30002
"And to be clear, I am the hell. And the high water."

oh bt, I am making sympathy noises over here. I'm sorry.

I'm glad you had a good party though.


Zenkitty - Sep 17, 2013 9:02:24 pm PDT #4824 of 30002
Every now and then, I think I might actually be a little odd.

aw, bt, I'm sorry for the family drama, but glad you have such a wonderful family of your own.


billytea - Sep 17, 2013 9:06:15 pm PDT #4825 of 30002
You were a wrong baby who grew up wrong. The wrong kind of wrong. It's better you hear it from a friend.

I'm glad you had a good party though.

It was an awesome party. Props to my sister and her husband, who hosted it and did the food, and my youngest brother, who organised the alcohol. (I just had one glass of wine, but it was a very nice glass.)