In other words, don't go into the military as an enlisted man with no career direction.

Totally this.

My DexH was a superstar in the Navy for as long as he could hack it...I've told his court martial story here before...it ended magically well. But, he went in out of desperation, with no clear path...which might have been the problem in the end.

My father and grandfather were in the Navy.

One of the great things about my grandfather was that he got recruited as an athlete and spent the majority of his early career being shipped around the world to run in track and field events. No combat. Because he was an engineer, by the time his track career came to an end, he was able to settle into Mare Island (CA), fixing wiring in docked ships.

In other words, I concur with the 'have a plan' plan.

CJ's background makes him, at a very young age, MUCH more eligible to choose his own path.

Oh! Just thought of another example.

One of the kids on my walk across America endured a truly unstable mom...seriously ill...and, despite being nurtured by an entire community of peaceniks, he chose to go into the military to find the stability he instinctively knew he needed.

He went in as a musician and has enjoyed a fulfilling career and saved himself from a LOT of grief.

Not everyone in our community respected his choice...out of incredibly misguided blindness...but I can't even proud I was of his self-awareness and practicality.

One of my recent weddings was for a 'comptroller' which meant he has a life-long career as an accountant. So smart.

I say all this by virtue of, there are SO MANY jobs within the military.

If I were to counsel someone who isn't sure about where they fit, I'd suggest avoiding the gun-toting portion of the program if that is not your passion and the medical corp.

CJ might actually be great as a field medic but...yikes.

Thanks. He does want to go into emergency services eventually. But so far he hasn't expressed interest in following that into the Army, thinking that any experience is good experience and he will have money for school when he gets out. I'd rather he go to school first and go in as an officer if he absolutely wants to go into the military.

I know too many guys who have gone into the military and come out different people, and not for the better. When I try to discuss this with CJ, I get "but you know me and you know I won't change". Oh honey, it isn't that easy.

KCD was in the Navy and his father was in the Army, so I guess there is a family tradition.

Have a plan. Yep, that is good. Critical.

If combat is the hesitation, than look into another branch, less known for direct contact with the enemy. Firefighting/rescue? Maybe Navy.Serve on an Air Craft Carrier, deal with planes that land a bit too hard? Or, Coast Guard! It's the overlooked branch of the military. Fly in the fun orange helicopters and pluck people out of the drink.

CJ might actually be great as a field medic but...yikes.

Yes, this. I can't even address the danger side because his long term goals are fireman/tactical medic which carry at least as much danger as the military.

The tough part of having a plan is that the recruiter guy can promise the moon to CJ but has no ability to actually give it to him.

I concur about the Coast Guard for emergency services, along with the National Guard.

Is is a confession to say I've been watching American Ninja Warrior (and loving it despite the parade of fail). One of this year's contestants is a DC firefighter who did a tour of duty in, I disremember...maybe the Army?

Suze, I can totally see what you are saying about the vagaries of the military having a diminishing effect. But, I wonder how many of the folks who don't cope well have the kind of discipline and drive that CJ has.

wrod. (see, Private Benjamin and the condos) Although I still wish they made comedies like that.

The tough part of having a plan is that the recruiter guy can promise the moon to CJ but has no ability to actually give it to him.

This is true for ANY contract situation...much less a situation where the recruiter's livelihood hinges on agreements.

No signatures now, is a good idea.

Plus, finding a civilian military lawyer in your area (I've worked for one here) who can look over the contract before you commit is a possibility.

I'd rather he go to school first and go in as an officer if he absolutely wants to go into the military.

It is possible to get your degree while you're in, too. That's what my brother did. He actually ended up with his masters.

What Amy said.

I've known a couple of doctors who got their degrees on the job. They had to commit to...I think, but don't quote me on this...6 years post grad service. But, hey, free medical school does not grow on trees!